
Do I need to quit my job to heal from burnout? This is one of the most common questions I hear asked in the burnout community. The answer? It depends. Like most things when it comes to burnout, your journey is unique and you may or may not need to leave your current job in order to make a full recovery.
One of the things I recommend to my one-on-one clients is to stay in their existing job (as long as it’s not extremely toxic) to see how much recovery they can accomplish in their current situation. This helps people take responsibility for their pieces of the puzzle, so that they can more easily identify and address the external factors that might be contributing to their burnout.
Tune into this week’s #straightfromcait episode to learn more about distinguishing between the internal and external causes behind your burnout. If you’re ready to start the healing process, go ahead and book a free one-on-one consultation with me using the link below! We will get clear on the specifics of your burnout story, so you can determine the approach that’s best for you.
Quotes
• “Burnout causes are such a mixed bag of your own shit and life-work shit that it can be really hard to pull those two things apart, especially in the beginning.” (01:30-01:39)
• “We are trying to figure out which pieces are internal and which pieces are external, which pieces you can control by doing some internal work and which pieces you can only control by leaving your job and changing your environment.” (02:08-02:26)
• “I do not believe that it is the work of the individual to change corporate or company culture, but some people do choose to stay in their positions and see if they can help spearhead a change. Some people realize that the change is beyond their capabilities, so creating an exit strategy becomes freeing.” (10:10-10:27)
• “So, do you need to quit your job to heal? Maybe. But first, let’s get clear on what’s happening, so that you can make that decision with clarity, with purpose and without guilt or shame.” (11:28-11:41)
Links
https://facebook.com/groups/friedtheburnoutpodcast
https://caitdonovan.com/freebie-ie
If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait
XOXO,
C
Jim Young’s burnout story began when he was prematurely anointed “man of the house” at nine years old. Because Jim’s single mother was stretched so thin, Jim ended up taking on a great deal of responsibility around the household. He was taught at a young age that just doing without asking questions was the ideal template for masculinity. This mindset eventually led Jim to severe burnout in all areas of his life from his work to his marriage to his personal wellbeing.
After hitting peak burnout, Jim decided to quit his job and start rebuilding a life that he loves. Now, Jim works as a men’s burnout coach, providing men with the tools and support they need to regain time, balance, energy and fun in their lives. Jim explains that financial privilege does not prevent burnout, nor does the privilege of being a white male. Instead, the paradigms that we have been taught to exist within as a result of our gender, race and/or financial status often play a massive role in our burnout stories.
Tune into this week’s episode of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast to hear more about how Jim defied the masculine template he had grown up following and rediscovered the joy in his life. Learn about the dangers of emotional gold digging, the importance of honoring our values, and why we should always find a way to fit our work into our lives rather than the other way around.
Quotes
• “My strategy as it evolved over time was to just do little things all the time that were good for me and discover. Half of the time, I didn’t know what I was doing, but I was just discovering the next thing that I needed.” (14:35-14:45)
• “My marriage ended, and I thought I was a failure as a man. So, I had all of this shame, and I didn’t want to talk to anybody.” (16:56-17:05)
• “Emotional gold diggers…[are] men who only get emotional support from one person in their life: their spouse.” (17:45-17:56)
• “You could make as much money as you want, you could be financially set forever and still be in burnout because you still have to win, you still have to compete, and you have all of these people clawing at you and those people are suffering and struggling because they’re stepping on each other.” (25:19-25:33)
• “I needed to feel like I am present to my kids….Not honoring that value was just so expensive to me.” (29:48-30:05)
• “There are so many men out there...who want to support each other. I’ve seen that from guys who have never done any of this work and guys who have been doing men’s work for years stepping in and just showing up for each other. Because one of the things that men can do is show up.” (50:35-50:52)
Links
https://www.thecenteredcoach.com/
https://www.instagram.com/jimproviser/
https://www.linkedin.com/in/thecenteredcoach/
Gratefulness.org: https://gratefulness.org/
Sympónia Men: https://www.symponiamen.com/
The ManDate Show: https://www.mandateshow.com/
The Better Man Conference: https://bettermanconference.com/
Evryman: https://evryman.com/
The ManKind Project: https://mankindproject.org/
XOXO,
C
If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait
https://caitdonovan.com/freebie-values
Our bodies and brains are naturally resilient – they are constantly working to achieve a state of equilibrium. However, this inherent resilience can get depleted when we are burnt out, meaning that our bandwidth is diminished and our bounce back ability is lowered.
So, what can we do to strengthen our resilience when we are feeling burnt out? In her contribution to Harvard Business Review’s Emotional Intelligence Series on resilience, journalist Diane Coutu explains that only one behavior has been strongly linked to high resilience: asking for help. While it may seem counterintuitive, facing things on your own actually decreases your capacity for resilience. Instead, leaning on support systems goes much further in boosting your ability to bounce back.
Tune into this week’s #straightfromcait episode to learn more about the characteristics and behaviors that make you hardy in the face of stress. Learn about the three main characteristics of resilient people, the importance of leaning into your core values, and why taking improv classes just might make you more resilient!
Quotes
• “Your body and brain are naturally resilient. They constantly balance and rebalance themselves to maintain homeostasis, they adjust what needs adjusting, and you just continue about your day none the wiser….But sometimes, even naturally resilient things break down.” (01:16-01:32)
• “The truth is science doesn’t really know exactly what makes one person come to a difficult situation and move through it with relative ease and grace while another person struggles and breaks down.” (02:30-02:40)
• “[When it comes to resilience], there’s both a toughness and a softness, a leaning in for help and asking and an ability to move through.” (03:26-03:34)
• “This is one of the main reasons we burn out: because we’ve adopted the values of our cultures and families without stopping to ask if they really suit us.” (05:40-05:49)
• “The one behavior that is related to high resilience is asking for help….Standing alone because you think it makes you stronger weakens your resilience.” (07:53-08:30)
Links
https://store.hbr.org/books/hbr-emotional-intelligence-series/
https://caitdonovan.com/freebie-values
bit.ly/bouncebackorder
XOXO,
C
If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait
**TW: This episode contains a description of a violent hate crime.**
“It’s a Fitbit for your mouth,” says Andrew Lee, Registered Dental Hygienist and Founder of Otis Dental. Drew is describing his Brux-Sensor Night Guard, a micro-dental-sensor technology that helps monitor and regulate your stress levels by recording your teeth grinding during sleep! Drew was recently awarded a patent for this technology, which he hopes will help users proactively identify heightened stress levels, even if they don’t consciously notice them.
Drew tells listeners that bruxism, or the involuntary clenching of the mouth and grinding of the teeth, is actually at the root of several top burnout symptoms. If you are experiencing headaches, neck or shoulder tension or insomnia, chances are that bruxism is involved. Drew notes that the dental industry has been relatively stagnant when it comes to addressing issues like bruxism, and the clunky night guards that dentists offer patients are often expensive and ineffective. Drew has made it his mission to create a direct-to-consumer offering that cuts out the middleman and brings customers the relief they need at an affordable price point.
Tune into this week’s episode FRIED. The Burnout Podcast to learn more about how bruxism could be tied to your burnout. Learn more about Drew’s own burnout story (he suffered from bruxism himself!), the three main causes of bruxism, and Drew’s top tips and tricks for overcoming your bruxism to reduce stress, improve sleep and protect your teeth!
Quotes
• “We’ve got to focus more in the dental industry on preventative measures rather than restoratives where it becomes too late and now you need to get botox injections in your jaw or you have to get all these fillings and crowns and implants and bridges and then eventually by the time we’re older, we end up with dentures and then we never really question, ‘What did I do to make it go this way?’” (08:15-08:36)
• “The truth is [dentists] are people, too. They have their flaws and their limitations. It’s just like seeing doctors or firefighters who smoke, and they know the dangers of it. It’s just contradictory and hypocritical – that’s just who we are. We’re humans.” (11:33-11:47)
• “Especially in this modernization of the digital world, we forget everything that our bodies are telling us and then it becomes asymptomatic where it’s still happening to us, we just don’t feel it anymore because we choose not to feel it.” (13:25-13:37)
• “That’s where meditation comes in. Find your core again. Remember who you were before this all happened. You’re there, you’re still in there – you just really need to pull that person back out of the darkness and say, ‘You’re ok, you’re gonna be ok. You can do this.’” (22:22-22:38)
• “70% of the reason why we brux is because of stress, some form of stress....The remaining 30% can be a combination of just misaligned teeth….A huge factor is also medication. There are a lot of antidepressants that actually cause bruxism." (25:15-25:40)
Links
https://www.instagram.com/hello_otis
Guide to Self Gua Sha Routine for Neck and Jaw Tension from Beth Russell: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bgzy9k2x5ys
XOXO,
C
If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait
When we are on the road to burnout recovery, all of us have the same question: How long will my burnout recovery last? In my professional experience, I have found that the average recovery period lasts around 12-18 months, but the reality is that burnout recovery looks different for everyone. As much as you might want to look to others’ stories for guidance, your burnout journey will always be your own.
However, there are steps you can take along the way to ease the process. On today’s #straightfromcait episode, I will share my top three tips for facilitating a smooth burnout recovery. The journey will never be easy, but by doing one thing at a time, giving yourself grace and compassion and taking responsibility only for the portion that belongs to you, you can supercharge your recovery.
Plus, don’t forget to join the FRIED. The Burnout Podcast Discussion Group on Facebook! This discussion group is an excellent place for you to receive support along the road to recovery from those who understand it best. Remember to be kind to yourself and lean on others as much as you need to along the way.
Quotes
• “What I’ve seen in clients and patients over the years is that recovery runs anywhere from about three months for burnout light situations to about two years or even longer.” (1:45-1:58)
• “When I say only do one thing at a time, what I mean is, do not overhaul your diet, go back to work and start meditating all on the same Monday. Burnout recovery works best in stages.” (2:25-2:37)
• “Give yourself grace….Everybody going through this process is on a different path, and you’ll all go through different burnout recovery stages at different times. There is no perfect order, no matter what anyone tells you about how this is supposed to unfold. Whatever order helps you to progress is the only order that matters in your life.” (5:45-6:13)
• “Grace, compassion, space, and kindness: give yourself those things as much as you can.” (6:50-7:00)
• “Reach for a point where you know as well as you can how much of your burnout is internal...and how much is due to your workplace/environment/relationships.” (7:02-7:19)
• “Burnout recovery does not require diving into your past traumatic experiences….In the beginning of your recovery, the focus is on helping your body to rewire responses and habits related to being on nonstop alert. This can be done without any revisiting of old trauma.” (9:46-10:08)
Links
https://facebook.com/groups/friedtheburnoutpodcast
XOXO,
C
If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait
“Push your edge and not your buttons,” says Daniel Mangena, International Speaker, Bestselling Author, Broadcaster and Coach. If there’s one thing that listeners should take away from today’s episode, Dan says it’s to pick one change and intentionally incorporate it into your life rather than inundating yourself. The road to burnout recovery is paved with small steps rather than a massive life overhaul!
Dan’s own burnout was catalyzed by his fixation on others’ opinions. He found that he was putting so much weight on what others may or may not have been thinking about him that he lost sight of what really mattered in his life. He spent many years contemplating suicide and was stopped only by the thought of what others might think if he botched the attempt. After poring over recent studies and ancient texts in search for the missing link in his life, Dan started his burnout recovery almost by accident. He explains that by polluting his brain with positivity, he slowly began to nourish his mind and discover self-acceptance.
Tune into this week’s episode of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast for a fascinating conversation with Dan about finding your purpose and manifesting your dreams. Learn how Dan’s Asperger’s diagnosis has radically changed his outlook, why your knot is not contingent on society’s expectations, and why adding nourishment to your life is a surefire way to counteract burnout.
Quotes
• “When I look at my burnout event...it was literally closing down and giving up on life because I had given such credence, weight and value to my belief about what other people may or may not think about me.” (3:25-3:46)
• “I don’t believe anything is done in isolation, and success is always going to be, I believe, a communal effort, even if that community is indirect, even if it’s the communal effort between you and the people that buy your product from you or buy your services.” (21:34-21:54)
• “I really want to spark within people recognizing that their light, their knot, their strength is not contingent on society’s judgement about what your role is or where you’ve come from or what you create. I believe that it comes down to who you are and what’s showing up and that every single one of us do have something to contribute.” (31:25-31:47)
• “I had no intention of choosing life. It happened because the inputs that I polluted myself, I pummeled myself with, spoke to life.” (40:04-40:15)
• “When we start to starve ourselves of nourishment at any level, I believe we can start that cascading effect into what we call burnout, which may be experienced in the body last, but that’s not where it starts because the body is the last point of experience of what starts out as a vibration. So, we burn out vibrationally first, which I believe is cutting ourselves off from vibrational nourishment.” (45:27-45:49)
• “I always like to say, ‘Push your edge and not your buttons.’ Growth is going to come from pushing the edge. There’s going to be discomfort at the edge, that is growth. If there’s no discomfort, you’re not doing anything, you’re staying the same.” (58:23-58:34)
Links
https://www.instagram.com/dreamerceo
https://www.linkedin.com/in/dreamerceo/
XOXO,
C
If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait
Podcast production and show notes provided by FIRESIDE Marketing
Did you know that the items you choose to surround yourself with have a direct impact on your happiness AND your productivity? Sure, you may naturally feel more content when wrapped up in a cozy blanket or holding your favorite mug. But, did you know that the items you find most comforting and beautiful produce visible changes in your brain?
On this week’s #straightfromcait episode, I share findings from three neuroscience studies showing the power of visually appealing objects to shape our brain. Learn about the changes in our brain that occur when we are under large amounts of stress and how we can use our environment to counteract these negative outcomes in a meaningful way.
If you have an everyday object that you find particularly beautiful or that adds to your sense of contentment when you are in a given space, I’d love to hear from you. Join our FRIED. The Burnout Podcast Facebook Group if you haven’t already and share with us! We’re all in this together – let’s give ourselves the best possible chance of a full burnout recovery.
Quotes
• “When you experience something that is beautiful to you, it makes you feel like you just got a treat, and it makes it easier to make decisions that are based on what you actually want from life.” (3:44-3:53)
• “Your brain becomes more sensitive to threat the longer you experience stress, which means that you might be interpreting threat when there is none.” (4:46-4:57)
• “I want you to take a look at your workspace and ask yourself if there is anything you can do to make the lines around you softer.” (8:25-8:30)
• “Absorb this idea that you can utilize your environment to help shape your brain and to give yourself the best possible chance of full burnout recovery.” (10:38-10:50)
References
Bar, Moshe, and Maital Neta. “Visual Elements of Subjective Preference Modulate Amygdala Activation.” Neuropsychologia, vol. 45, no. 10, 2007, pp. 2191-2200. 10.1016/j.neuropsychologia.2007.03.008.
Gourley, Shannon L., et al. “The Medial Orbitofrontal Cortex Regulates Sensitivity to Outcome Value.” Journal of Neuroscience, vol. 36, no. 16, 2016, pp. 4600-4613. 10.1523/JNEUROSCI.4253-15.2016.
Ishizu, Tomohiru, and Semir Zeki. “Toward A Brain-Based Theory of Beauty.” PLOS One, 2011, https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0021852.
XOXO,
C
If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait
Podcast production and show notes provided by FIRESIDE Marketing
“I do not think it serves most humans to have a stigmatizing label,” says Diann Wingert, therapist turned Mindset and Productivity Coach. “I think once the label becomes your identity, it is a trap, and it will be your destination.” In her work as a coach, Diann has found the label of “Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria” particularly harmful, as it implies that extreme reactions to rejection, criticism and exclusion are in some way pathological. Instead of viewing RSD as a pathology, Diann instead helps her coaching clients adopt the mindset changes and resilience skills necessary to overcome rejection and move forward with confidence.
Diann tells listeners that rejection sensitivity played a key role in her own burnout experience. As a licensed therapist, she often found herself shaping the work she did with clients so that they would like her, as opposed to initiating the tough conversations that would propel them towards true growth and change. As a result, she began to resent her clients, along with just about everyone else in her life. It wasn’t until she closed her practice (and sold every last piece of furniture in the office!) that Diann was able to forge a new path for herself and establish the professional and personal boundaries necessary to end her burnout for good.
Tune into this week’s episode of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast for a conversation with Diann Wingert about coping with rejection. Learn about the dangers of pathologizing a normal human experience, why identifying resentments is a crucial step towards overcoming burnout, and how mindset changes can make a world of difference when it comes to silencing your inner shitty committee.
Quotes
• “I was seeing up to ten people a day, five days a week...and after five years of that, I realized that I was becoming impatient with my clients, I was tired of listening to stories that I thought were redundant and repetitive, and I literally wanted to stand up and say, ‘Haven’t we been talking about this long enough? Don’t you want to get on with it?’ And I thought, you can’t do this anymore. You are no good to anybody, including yourself.” (3:50-4:18)
• “The emotion that I wasn’t paying attention to and the one that ultimately propelled me out the door was resentment.” (5:05-5:14)
• “I didn’t want to be rejected by my clients. I was taking responsibility for their results, so I was shaping the work I did with them according to what I thought they could tolerate...because if I pushed them beyond what they could tolerate, they would be uncomfortable, they wouldn’t like me, and they’d leave, and I couldn’t help them anymore.” (11:20-11:45)
• “I do not think it serves most humans to have a stigmatizing label, and what I often find is that many people claim it, cling to it, and embrace it as an identity because it explains things, but it also can provide a place of safety and acceptance with others who also claim that identity. And while I think it’s very important to say, ‘This is my felt experience, this is my reality,’ I think once it becomes your identity, it is a trap and it will be your destination.” (24:30-25:14)
• “Most people resent the medication that helps them because of what they make it mean.” (28:44-28:52)
• “One of the things I find myself saying to my clients all the time is when they start to go off on a diatribe about how ridiculous they are, how stupid they are...I say, ‘Of course. Of course you did that. Of course you felt that way. How else would you feel?’” (49:50-50:13)
• “The sensitive people in the human tribe have always been the ones who are the most creative and have the most unique solutions to common human problems, but if we shame their sensitivity, they will go into hiding, and we will never know what they have to offer the world.” (51:31-51:45)
Links
https://www.diannwingertcoaching.com/
https://www.instagram.com/coachdiannwingert/
https://www.linkedin.com/in/diannwingertcoaching/
The Cook's Hookup Energy Technique: https://northeasthealing.com/stress-management-tip-cooks-hook-ups-technique/
HidrateSpark Water Bottle: https://hidratespark.com/products/hidratespark-steel
XOXO,
C
If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait
Podcast production and show notes provided by FIRESIDE Marketing
Did you know that although I received my Masters Degree in Acupuncture and East Asian Medicine back in 2007, I never received a Bachelor’s Degree? This academic path is actually quite common around the world, but definitely less so here in the states. And, of course, I happened to settle down in New Jersey, the one state in the entire country that doesn’t allow you to become licensed in or practice acupuncture without a Bachelor’s degree in addition to a Masters.
Fast forward to this summer: I am now going backwards at age 39 to receive a Bachelor’s Degree in Biobehavioral Health at Penn State’s World Campus. I am loving the opportunity to throw myself back into academics and to establish connections between my background in Eastern Medicine and the concepts we’ve explored so far in my new courses.
Tune into this week’s #straightfromcait episode to learn more about my journey back into higher education as an adult. Learn about the overlaps between Biobehavioral Health and Eastern medicine, why science always has its shortcomings, and why it’s never too late to dive back into the world of academia.
If you have any questions you want answered about burnout and the science behind it, feel free to share your thoughts in our FRIED. Facebook Group. In the coming weeks, I’ll be sharing research articles and other relevant sources on my #straightfromcait episodes, plus I’m always on the lookout for a good research paper topic!
Quotes
• “So, I decided at the age of 39 that I’m going to go backwards and get a degree that is lesser than the one I have to be able to practice a medicine that I’ve been at for a decade and a half. I told you, it’s a little convoluted, but here we are.” (3:00-3:20)
• “Biobehavioral health is like the Western version of Eastern medicine. It’s the Western medicine’s ideal of creating a more holistic system.” (4:16-4:26)
• “I both love science and remain a science skeptic….Science is incomplete and will always be – that’s part of its definition. It’s a beautiful, powerful thing that we have to remember is here to help us explore and to learn and then to continue exploring and learning. Everything we learn is simply another step to getting another step to getting another step to allow us to go deeper or broader or connect things that weren’t connected before.” (5:40-6:11)
• “I didn’t add a full-time degree to my life and not eliminate anything else. I had to eliminate something in order to maintain my sanity and be sure that I’m not burning out while I’m researching burnout and talking to you about burnout.” (8:08-8:22)
Links
Penn State Biobehavioral Health Bachelor’s Degree: https://www.worldcampus.psu.edu/degrees-and-certificates/penn-state-online-biobehavioral-health-bachelors-degree/
FRIED. The Burnout Podcast Facebook Group: https://facebook.com/groups/friedtheburnoutpodcast
XOXO,
C
If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait
Podcast production and show notes provided by FIRESIDE Marketing
“I think of food as medicine. Everything you eat becomes every cell in your body, so it can be healing or it can be potentially exacerbating the issue,” says Carolyn Brown, nutritionist and co-founder of Indigo Wellness Group. Carolyn explains that when it comes to burnout recovery, food can act as a healing or a harmful force, depending on how it is used. That’s why she tends to promote simple, enjoyable additions rather than harsh, restrictive diets. When we are focusing on decreasing our stress levels, hardcore changes to our diets or exercise routines will only raise our cortisol levels even more.
Carolyn is no stranger to burnout. Her burnout story began in New York City, where she was living in a shoebox apartment and seeing over 150 clients a month one-on-one. Carolyn felt stifled in just about every aspect of her life, from her physical space to her work life to the NYC dating scene. When she finally realized how burnt out she had become, she finally made a cross-country move to Colorado, where she could find the physical and emotional space to breathe.
Tune into the kickoff episode of our 4th season of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast for a conversation with Carolyn about the restorative power of simple changes. Learn why loving where you live is a crucial step towards mental and physical wellness, how seemingly small changes can make a world of difference in your day-to-day life, and why gentler is better for your body and your soul when it comes to nutrition.
Quotes
• “I had this total a-ha moment following a full-on breakdown. I was walking through the streets of Rome hysterically crying wondering if anyone had ever been so lost in their whole life.” (4:50-5:02)
• “Get the veggies that look beautiful or the plates and the mugs. That was something really important to me when I started my new, fresh life in Denver, I got rid of everything from that New York apartment. So every single mug or plate I was buying, I wanted to try to be supporting a small, woman-owned business and also have it be something I loved every single time I picked it up.” (25:42-26:06)
• “Clutter ends up impacting what we eat and how we eat, too….Clutter can make us eat up to 44% more. And we’re more likely to eat the unhealthy things when we’re in an environment of clutter.” (26:41-26:55)
• “I think of food as medicine. Everything you eat becomes every cell in your body, so it can be healing or it can be potentially exacerbating the issue….Just simply try to add one fermented food per day. I really think of addition when you’re feeling a little bit paralyzed, like what can we add in. This isn’t the time to say, ‘Let’s go on a sugar cleanse or anything like that.’” (37:26-37:56)
• “Make sure you’re hydrated. When we’re dehydrated, we’re just grouchier, especially women. There’s lots of research on this, that it really affects women’s decision-making, ability to focus and mood overall.” (39:08-39:20)
• “Please don’t try any crazy diets or extreme eating trends while feeling really stressed or burnt out. It adds to your stress levels. We want to really be focusing on decreasing stress and many of these things, whether it’s funky eating habits, severe intermittent fasting, going keto, or doing HIIT training, doing really intense exercise, actually ends up increasing our cortisol, increasing our stress hormones, doing the opposite of what you might hope to.” (39:53-40:25)
Links
Carolyn’s Website: www.indigowellnessgroup.com
Carolyn’s Instagram: www.instagram.com/carolynbrownie
Register for Carolyn’s Detox’ish Week: https://academy.indigowellnessgroup.com/courses/indigo-detox-ish-week-august-2021
XOXO,
C
If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait
Podcast production and show notes provided by FIRESIDE Marketing
“Grief is inevitable,” says Jess Brennan, founder of Held Massage Therapy. “Every single one of us will lose something precious.” Jess explains that grief doesn’t just occur after a death; instead, the grieving process can occur any time our expectations for the future are unexpectedly taken from us. From losing a loved one to getting a divorce to having a long-awaited graduation cancelled due to COVID, there are countless times in our lives when our visions for what “should be” are ripped away without warning.
That’s where Jess comes in. Not only has she been a birth doula for 15 years, but she is also an end-of-life doula and a spiritual mentor for times of loss and transition. She founded Held Massage Therapy after undergoing a period of intense change in her own life and hopes to provide others with the level of care she yearned for throughout that tumultuous time.
Tune into the season finale of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast for a powerful and emotional discussion with Jess Brennan about grief, burnout and COVID. Learn about the differences between grief readiness and loss literacy, the critical role that doulas play both at birth and in death, and how best to support yourself and others through the grieving process. You won’t want to miss this intimate conversation between two friends about the collective grief we have been experiencing as a people post-COVID and how to begin the healing journey.
Quotes
• “My experience of both grief and burnout, having known both of them, is that it’s an introduction back into futility and powerlessness and humility, and it’s wild and painful and, as Westerners, those things are kryptonite for us. We’re not ready for them, we don’t like them, we want to escape and numb out at all costs from those things, but no matter how hard we try to rage against the truth of what is, it’s immovable.” (3:56-4:31)
• “She listened as I talked, and she just said, ‘Yup, yup, yup.’ She literally held me and let it be exactly as it was and communicated in so many ways that I was loved and that she trusted me with myself.” (9:49-10:02)
• “We’re very low on grief readiness and loss literacy, which I think of as two different things. Grief readiness is for ourselves, and loss literacy is how well are we prepared, how skillful can we be, to support the people around us going through a loss.” (22:15-22:30)
• “The biggest lie that we tell ourselves in grief is that all I have to do is get myself back. All I have to do is get back to who I was before.” (22:45-22:55)
• “Many of the remedies are annoyingly obvious and simple. And so we don’t want to do them because it’s like no, I want a sophisticated answer, I want a complicated thing….Tend to the mammal, tend the human mammal. Give your animal body what it needs.” (28:46-29:19)
• “Grief is not a pathology. It’s a natural human response to losing something we love, and we live in a world where nothing is permanent, so it’s inevitable….Every single one of us will lose something precious.” (33:52-34:15)
• “It’s a similar skillset to grieve fully as to be with one who is grieving. The difference is that when you’re grieving, there’s the vulnerability and the freefall. You have to be willing to just free fall. When you’re with somebody, companioning a grieving person, the groundedness is essential. Being safe enough so that that person can fall in your presence and can say everything that they need to say without fear of judgement, without feeling like they’re going to be corrected.” (51:42-52:12)
Links
https://www.heldmassagetherapy.com/
https://www.heldmassagetherapy.com/free-course
https://www.instagram.com/held_massage_therapy/
https://www.facebook.com/heldmassagetherapy
XOXO,
C
If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait
Podcast production and show notes provided by FIRESIDE Marketing
What is the difference between burnout and depression? I was recently asked this question in the FRIED. The Burnout Podcast Discussion Group on Facebook. Because I explored this topic at length in my book The Bouncebackability Factor: End Burnout, Gain Resilience, and Change the World, I decided to share a short excerpt on this week’s #straightfromcait episode.
While depression and burnout look different for everyone, my conclusion is that they may simply be two sides of the same coin. The key distinction seems to be that burnout is associated with high levels of stress, whether it’s due to work or to general life events, while depression may not have such a direct cause.
Tune into this week’s #straightfromcait episode to learn more about the overlaps and distinctions between burnout and depression and how they have manifested themselves differently in my own life. Once you have listened to the episode, I encourage you to join our Facebook discussion group (if you haven’t already!) and share your thoughts. Has depression been part of your burnout story? I look forward to hearing from you!
Quotes
• “The World Health Organization calls burnout an occupational hazard, but it’s an overall wellness hazard. It literally affects everything.” (2:49-2:56)
• “My view is that burnout and depression are different results with similar causes. I believe that untreated burnout can lead to depression, so burnout can be part of the road to depression, but doesn’t need to be. My feeling is that the main difference is that people that are burnt out know they are burnt out, and that it’s because of overwhelm and too much stress. With depression, it often seems unrelated to other things.” (5:45-6:13)
• “In my opinion, the depression associated with burnout manifests itself in self-doubt. When burnt out, you start questioning yourself and your abilities and/or passion for your chosen path.” (7:06-7:16)
Links
https://facebook.com/groups/friedtheburnoutpodcast
https://monkeypuzzletraining.co.uk/free-downloads/MBI_self_assessment_for_organisations.pdf
XOXO,
C
If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait
Podcast production and show notes provided by FIRESIDE Marketing
“I don’t want to hear anything about the theoretical translation of an ancient Chinese concept translated half-assed into English translated half-assed through your Western construct of what the hell it means,” says Jade Connolly Duggan, Corporate Culture and Wellness Expert. The daughter of two acupuncturists, Jade has had the practice of acupuncture flowing through her veins practically since birth. However, she explains that most of the time finding mind-body wellness is much more about consciously conversing with your body than it is about theory or predetermined labels. While theory has its benefits, it often fails to tell the complete story.
A high-school dropout who helped the NSA communicate more effectively with the CIA and saved Pepsi’s culture-merge when purchasing Gatorade, Jade is an expert in teaching soft skills to business and community teams. After hitting and overcoming burnout multiple times in her life, Jade has made it her mission to help others reconnect with their body’s intuitive dial, so they can lead more fulfilling and attuned lives.
Tune into this week’s episode of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast for a conversation with Jade about learning to listen to what your body is telling you. Learn why perfection is the enemy of done, why English is incredibly barren when it comes to descriptors of sensation, and why getting curious about your mind and your body is an excellent way to overcome your burnout.
Quotes
• “I was single parenting my first child, I was living on my own, and I was working and commuting and not living near family support. And I remember thinking to myself, ‘If I don’t get some help soon, I’m gonna die.’ And I was in the hospital with meningitis within two weeks.” (3:16-3:36)
• “It was very humbling to be an acupuncturist, to be in acupuncture school, to be in a family of acupuncturists and to have this sense of not knowing how to mitigate or navigate my burnout.” (8:16-8:30)
• “I recognize that there are things that I can experience in another language that I can’t experience in English. It’s a body, right? My language invents the body I get to inhabit.” (37:00-37:12)
• “How do we get these physicians who run a big portion of all of the medical schools together in their board to look at that chasm between each other and see if they can close that gap and get a little bit closer to maybe I can know a little bit more, but only if I can actually have more language around it, if I can listen a little bit closer, if I can actually get close enough to have the poetry of your existence in my own body in some way?” (42:06-42:42)
• “Part of the work for me is moment by moment to go, ‘There is no right.’” (48:53-48:56)
• “Is this what you’re actually experiencing or is it what you read in a book? Is it what you think you’re supposed to be experiencing? Is it a ‘should’ from somewhere else?...If I didn’t have the label of burnout, or I didn’t have the label of anger, or if I didn’t have the label of depression, or whatever it was, what’s the experience that I’m having right now and when does that experience change even just a little tiny bit?” (57:00-57:32)
Links
https://www.mindbodyleadership.com/
https://www.instagram.com/nsfwleadership/
https://www.facebook.com/nsfwleadership/
https://www.mindbodyleadership.com/offers/YaoELLJB/checkout (Code: CURIOSITY)
XOXO,
C
If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait
Podcast production and show notes provided by FIRESIDE Marketing
If I’ve learned anything from my experience with burnout, both in my own life and in my clients’ lives, it’s that burnout can present itself in endless ways. While there must be three components present in order to identify burnout (physical and emotional exhaustion, cynicism and detachment, and a feeling of purposelessness), there are several other symptoms that tend to show up frequently in burnout patients.
On this week’s #straightfromcait episode, we will explore the most commonly experienced physical burnout symptoms, according to 73 health questionnaire responses. Some of the symptoms, such as headaches, neck tension, digestive upset and sleep issues, may seem obvious. However, others, such as hives, PMS symptoms and frequent urination might come as a surprise for many listeners.
As always, I would love to hear from you, too! What were your predominant symptoms while you were burnt out? Or, if you are in the midst of working through your burnout, what symptoms are you currently dealing with? Comment on any post from this week with your thoughts! And remember: no matter what your symptoms, I believe you and am here to support you in your burnout journey.
P.S. Season 3 of the podcast is coming to a close, with the last episode airing on July 18! If you would like to influence what happens on FRIED. The Burnout Podcast in upcoming seasons, join our Facebook group (linked below), so you can share your suggestions. We can’t wait to have you!
Quotes
• “In order to identify burnout, according to researcher Christina Maslach, there must be at least three components present. And those components are: physical and emotional exhaustion, that’s number one; number two is cynicism and detachment; and number three is feeling purposeless, unimpactful and unaccomplished.” (4:54-5:13)
• “Seventy three percent of people experiencing burnout report having neck tension, and this might explain the high headache and migraine reports. If everyone’s necks are tense, it’s logical that headaches and migraines will arise. This also tells us where we should focus should we want to help the body decrease burnout symptoms, i.e. why things like acupuncture are so useful!” (7:06-7:26)
• “If a menstruating person is experiencing burnout, there’s a 78% chance that they are going to be experiencing some disruption in their menstrual cycle, some PMS, and some difficulty around their cycle.” (11:55-12:10)
• “The range of symptoms you can experience are from head to toe, from physical to emotional, and everything in between.” (13:33-13:40)
Links
FRIED Facebook Group: https://facebook.com/groups/friedtheburnoutpodcast
XOXO,
C
If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait
Podcast production and show notes provided by FIRESIDE Marketing
Erica Cuni’s burnout story begins with a Mack Dump Truck, which hit her as she was on her way to work as a licensed therapist. In the ensuing months, Erica not only had to learn how to walk again after almost losing her foot, but she also lost her job, ended a long-term toxic relationship, found herself in extreme debt, and ended up living with her parents again in her mid-thirties. But this is not where Erica’s story ended. Instead, she used this stress-inducing time in her life to reevaluate her priorities, get back into her body and kick start her journey towards mental, physical and spiritual health.
Now, Erica works as a full-time burnout recovery and prevention educator, a podcast host and a Reiki practitioner. She is living her #UndeniableTruth and has made a career out of helping others do the same. According to Erica, #UndeniableTruth is what she wished she had in her life when she was falling apart and didn’t have a roadmap to help her rediscover who she was or what she needed to thrive. Now, Erica uses wisdom from her own burnout experience to guide her clients as they heal from burnout, find their truth and learn to live with intention.
Tune into this week’s episode of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast to hear more about Erica’s journey from burnout victim to Burnout Professor. Learn about the things Erica wishes she was taught in grad school, the importance of working with a trauma-informed therapist if you are in the throes of burnout and why breathwork is absolutely essential for grounding yourself and navigating stress. Most importantly, learn how Erica refused to let her burnout get the best of her and instead capitalized on her burnout to positively reshape her future.
Quotes
• “Anyone that experiences burnout knows that it’s not just related to work. It affects every piece of your life.” (4:37-4:44)
• “I lost myself somewhere, and I didn’t know when I lost myself. I didn’t understand because I thought I was doing everything right….I had a Master’s degree, I was helping other people figure their stuff out, I was trained in all these different types of modalities on how to help people get there, but I was like, ‘I’m still missing something!’” (8:22-8:40)
• “In order for us to get success out of talk therapy, our brains have to be in a calmer state, our bodies have to be in a calm state. And so when you do the body work first...and you get someone back into the body, back into the present moment, that opens up the brain so that they can start to self-reflect because talk therapy’s all about self-reflection.” (16:00-16:20)
• “When you get burnt out, it’s about learning a new lifestyle afterwards….Find something that engages your body back into the present moment, and that sends signals up to your brain that, ‘Hey, I’m back here in this world!’....because ultimately we want to have people understand that it’s safe to take risks and enjoy life. It’s safe to enjoy your life. You don’t have to stay in this stressed state where you’re afraid to do anything.” (27:16-27:55)
• “If for whatever reason you don’t believe in meditation, I do believe you believe in sitting still and being in the moment and learning how to do that because you know that you feel better and calmer.” (34:50-35:00)
• “Knowing my breath is what helped me get in tune with my body, so that I could listen to it so that I could make decisions that were aligned with me versus my mind trying to dictate what I was supposed to be doing.” (38:18-38:33)
Links
https://www.theburnoutprofessor.com
https://www.instagram.com/theburnoutprofessor
https://www.linkedin.com/theburnoutprofessor
https://www.facebook.com/theburnoutprofessor
https://www.theburnoutprofessor.com/burnout-quiz
XOXO,
C
If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait
Podcast production and show notes provided by FIRESIDE Marketing
COVID has sucked, there’s no question about it. But at the same time, the pandemic has given us an unexpected excuse with which to better uphold our boundaries. Now that COVID regulations are loosening, this automatically acceptable justification is beginning to disappear. So, how do you uphold your boundaries even after social distancing and mask mandates are lifted?
The key is getting honest with yourself about your values. I recommend first completing my Living According to Your Core Values worksheet (which is free on my website and linked below!). This will help you identify the values that are most fundamental in your daily life. Then, I suggest creating action statements around each of these values. For example, if a value of yours is family, an action statement might be “Eat dinner together as a family 5 nights a week with no phones.”
Not only will this exercise allow you to better incorporate your values into your day-to-day life, but it will also allow you to uphold your boundaries in a clear, kind and concise way. When it comes to boundaries, it’s important to avoid white lies, passive aggression and wiggle room. By integrating your values into your life in a tangible way, you can honestly and efficiently express your boundaries to others.
Like anything, boundary building takes practice. If you need a little support along the way, I’ll be watching the hashtag #buildbetterboundaries all week to help clear up your boundary statements (if you’re brave enough to write some!) and make sure there are no thorns, no lies and no wiggle room!
This is one of the most important skills you need to recover from burnout and prevent it in the future. You’ve got this!
Quotes
• “So, how do you keep the pieces of the pandemic that really worked for you and still have space for adding some community time, friendship time and extended family time to your calendar?...You start by getting really honest about your values.” (2:44-3:01)
• “When you are able, with clarity, to define your values, your decision making process becomes easier and then the language you use to build boundaries becomes clearer and it becomes easier for you to say, easier for you to share and easier for other people to accept and just move on from.” (3:29-3:50)
• “When boundaries are well-stated, they are clear, kind and concise...When boundaries are well-stated, they avoid lies, thorns and wiggle room.” (7:30-7:47)
• “The more you practice...making sure your boundaries are clear, kind and concise, the easier it becomes because you realize that it actually improves all of your relationships. No one’s wondering if they’re putting you out because you’re not letting anybody put you out. You’re not worrying if somebody’s pushing you too far because you don’t let people push you too far. The boundaries that you create speaking this way will make all of your relationships better if you give it enough time.” (10:41-11:13)
Links
https://caitdonovan.com/freebie-values
XOXO,
C
If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait
Podcast production and show notes provided by FIRESIDE Marketing
On paper, Sumeena Gupta was leading what looked like the perfect life. She and her husband were running a resort on a breathtaking Balinese island, which to many people might seem like a dream job in a dream location. But, Sumeena wasn’t happy. Instead, she was stuck in a constant state of despair. And this feeling of hopelessness, stress and exhaustion was only compounded by the sense of shame she experienced when people told her how lucky she was. Even her husband failed to really hear and validate Sumeena’s burnout, leaving her feeling more alone than ever.
It wasn’t until Sumeena started putting a name to her burnout that things began to change. Sumeena explains that she began utilizing the many wellness modalities available to her in Bali, which allowed her to ground herself and regain the sense of freedom she had lost in the chaos of running her own business. Five years later, Sumeena’s business is ten times more successful. She has found peace and support in her relationship with her husband, has been able to travel around the world with her family and is running her business better than ever, all because she addressed and overcame her burnout.
Now, Sumeena is an Expert Business Mentor to Womxn and makes a point to discuss her deeply felt experience of burnout with her clients. She hopes that this will allow them to learn from her own mistakes, so they can set boundaries, identify their core values and avoid falling into the burnout cycle.
Tune into this week’s episode of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast for a conversation with Sumeena about recognizing, addressing and recovering from burnout. Learn about the importance of trusting your intuition and instincts, why it’s crucial to acknowledge rather than smooth over others’ discomfort, and why Balinese massages are the most magical massages out there.
Quotes
• “Most of us, we don’t know we’re in burnout when we are…I was in that cycle 100% probably for three or four years, which is a long time now that I reflect back.” (4:42-5:00)
• “I remember how often people would say to me, ‘Oh you’re living the dream….You’re so lucky. I wish that was me’....And my burnout was wrapped up in shame, actually, because I was like why do I feel so disconnected from the way that I should feel?” (5:42-6:02)
• “I’m really embedded in my values….and I was completely out of alignment with my values because one of them is freedom. And so, being out of alignment with my values was contributing to my burnout. Now what happened was, when I was able to work through that and able to still integrate freedom, for example, into my life, my business actually thrived.” (14:45-15:13)
• “Allowing things to go through you is one of the best ways to recover from burnout.” (22:18-22:22)
• “It works out if you do step back and you allow yourself to do the healing because long term you are going to be so much better off.” (24:37-24:46)
• “I’ve seen you talk about this a lot, how wellness professionals need their own wellness. And that’s exactly also what I believe about decision makers and leaders. We also need other people to help us make decisions sometimes and lead us sometimes because it’s exhausting to be the only person to be doing that all the time.” (39:49-40:08)
Links
https://www.instagram.com/sumeena_gupta/
https://www.linkedin.com/in/sumeenagupta/
https://www.facebook.com/sumeena.gupta/
Womxn who Business Facebook Group: http://bit.ly/WHB
YouTube Channel: http://bit.ly/YouTube_Sumeena
Know your values worksheet: https://www.caitdonovan.com/freebie-values
XOXO,
C
If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait
Podcast production and show notes provided by FIRESIDE Marketing
So you’re feeling burnt out, but the typical advice isn’t working? You’ve tried gratitude journaling, yoga, meditation, connecting with nature, and just about every Instagram “self-care” tip in the book….but you’re still just as burnt out as you started
Unfortunately, there is often a conflation between burnout recovery and burnout prevention. While you can absolutely use these tips to prevent burnout, they’re honestly pretty useless when it comes to recovering from it. When your brain is already fried and your body is in a constant state of fight or flight, trying to rest in these ways will only cause additional stress. So how do you rest restoratively without aggravating the burnout cycle even further?
Here are three rules that I have found useful for both myself and my clients in recovering from burnout.
1. Make it small. At the start of your burnout recovery, any attempt to intentionally rest for over 5 minutes is too long and will likely engage your stress response. One tip that I give my clients is to choose a song that they love and makes them feel connected to themselves. This does NOT have to be a calming song!! Just turn on the song and breathe while you listen to it. That’s your work for the day.
2. Release the need to have gratitude and create space for anger and resentment. We often have a preconceived notion that resentment and anger are “bad.” This is not the case at all. Instead, these emotions are telling us something important about ourselves, our bodies and our boundaries. Rather than constantly quieting these emotions, try listening to them.
3. Your rules are more important than mine! If something doesn’t feel right for you, then don’t do it. Or make the modifications you need to make it feel good in your own body and mind. Just because Instagram tells you to try something does NOT mean it is a solution that will work for you.
If you are feeling alone in your burnout, I am here to support you. Schedule a free consultation today using the link below OR join our brand new FRIED Facebook group to join a community of people that really gets it. We’re ready for you...are you ready to heal
Quotes
• “Burnout recovery and burnout prevention are not equal. They are not the same things.” (3:41-3:46)
• “If you’ve never been burnt out, and you’re giving burnout healing advice, you’re probably doing it wrong. I understand that your intentions might be good, but until you’ve faced the absolute despair and inability to function that true burnout presents as, you simply don’t understand that adding a morning or evening routine to your day or setting up a new exercise plan, just isn’t going to f*cking happen.” (3:51-4:18)
• “Burnout is not simply being stressed and tired. Burnout is exhaustion. Burnout is despair. Burnout is feeling like this is how life is always going to be and wanting to crash into a tree so that you get a ‘break’ in the hospital. Burnout can overlap with depression, but burnout is not depression. They are separate things.” (4:47-5:11)
• “Burnout recovery requires gentleness, kindness, time, and restorative rest….Just slowing down is not enough when it comes to burnout.” (6:16-7:15)
• “A major issue in burnout recovery is the need to focus on ‘positive emotions.’ If I see one more recommendation for someone to gratitude journal when they’re feeling burnt out, my own volcano might just blow. Our current inability to see the value in difficult emotions is something that really inhibits our ability to recover.” (11:05-11:26)
• “If we can start creating space to actually see and feel resentment, anger and irritation and transform it, we can start rebuilding the fences that we need around our energy to keep us safe, which actually helps us allow rest to be restorative. When our boundaries are strong and we feel safer, our amygdala starts to back down...because it doesn’t need to keep us safe when we’ve decided that we can do it. The more resentment we transform into boundaries, the easier restorative rest becomes.” (12:24-13:06)
Links
FRIED Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/friedtheburnoutpodcast
The Resentment Journal Mini Course: https://caitdonovan.com/resentment-journal
XOXO,
C
If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait
Podcast production and show notes provided by FIRESIDE Marketing
“When was the last time you were bored?” asks Jeff Harry, Founder of Rediscover Your Play, in our discussion about self-soothing. Nowadays, we are constantly surrounded by screens and stimulation, which can often serve as a mechanism of avoidance. By never turning away from our phones, shutting off Netflix or allowing ourselves to experience true boredom, we can hide from our emotions. But while this technique may feel temporarily comforting, it ultimately prevents us from confronting, overcoming and accepting ourselves in our most authentic form.
For a long time, Jeff himself was using a similar method of escapism to ignore his burnout. But after years of working on the campaign trail with long hours, unending urgency and little sense of purpose, Jeff finally decided to switch paths. Now, Jeff combines positive psychology and play to help individuals and companies tap into their true selves in order to feel their happiest and most fulfilled. His primary areas of focus include: dealing with toxicity in the workplace, addressing office politics, playing with your inner critic, helping your staff rediscover their flow, and navigating these uncertain times through play.
Tune into this week’s episode of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast for an in-depth and animated conversation about toxic positivity, faux authenticity and the difference between your rational and intuitive mind. Learn why Jeff has a name for his inner critic (it’s Gargamel, in case you were wondering) and why you don’t have to do it all to find healing, happiness and purpose. Sometimes, you just have to play.
Quotes
• “Burnout, at its deepest level, is the sum total of hundreds and thousands of tiny betrayals of purpose.” (6:25-6:36)
• “This is why I talk a lot about play: I feel like everyone’s already playing at work, meaning they’re showing up and being a certain character, right? ‘I’m a senior manager. I know what I’m talking about, blah, blah blah’...right? And it’s just like, it’s exhausting when you have to carry that. That’s why we’re burnt out because we’re being someone else.” (8:34-8:55)
• “We have to understand what the inner critic is. It’s your rational mind; your inner critic lies in your prefrontal cortex and your rational mind is there to keep you alive. That’s it! It’s there to keep you alive! So why do we go to it and be like, ‘Hey, should I take this risk?’ Because, guess what? Your rational mind’s gonna be like, ‘No, you should binge watch Netflix and stay under your duvet for the rest of your life.’” (18:06-18:30)
• “What positive psychology is is just simply studying what’s right with people and recognizing that other people matter….But it’s also about accepting all of the emotions that are happening and having you feel the whole emotion instead of denying that. Because when you’re denying it, you’re actually denying a part of how you should be living.” (26:37-27:02)
• “People pleasing is actually not people pleasing; it’s people manipulating. You are trying to manipulate people to like you, so then you’re going out of your way to help somebody….[even though] they never asked for your help. You’re giving them all this stuff, and then finally when you ask them for help, they don’t help you. And you’re like, ‘Oh my goodness, I can’t believe after everything I’ve done.’ It’s just like, they never asked.” (39:23-39:52)
• “When you allow yourself to get quiet, and you then play, then you realize what’s actually driving you. Most of the time, we don’t allow ourselves to get bored because we don’t want to hear those thoughts. We don’t want to know what’s actually driving us. We want to believe that we’re the hero in our own story and we keep the noise constantly on.” (44:25-44:48)
• “We have to be cultivating not just like our bank accounts, but also cultivating the community that’s going to watch out for us because that also really helps with our own mental health. And I don’t think we invest enough in that and invest enough in our community connections. Because studies find that people that live the longest have really strong relationships, really deep connections.” (52:09-52:32)
Links
https://www.rediscoveryourplay.com/
https://www.instagram.com/jeffharryplays/
https://www.linkedin.com/in/jeff-harry-6991a94/
https://medium.com/@jeffharryplays
http://bit.ly/RediscoverYourPlayBonus
XOXO,
C
If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait
Podcast production and show notes provided by FIRESIDE Marketing
As a coach, it can often be difficult to develop integrity around your abilities and limitations. Because coaching isn’t regulated, there can be some ambiguity surrounding what coaches are actually able to do and how they should advertise their offerings. Too often, I have heard stories about coaches who unintentionally triggered past traumas for a client, since they didn’t have the tools to address what was really going on.
In my coaching practice, even though I have a wealth of knowledge in the world of emotions and health, that doesn’t make me a therapist or a counselor. For example, I am not equipped to deal with deep-seated trauma, and I feel an obligation to relay that to my clients if they are in need of a licensed professional. Not to mention, there are plenty of therapists out there who are not trauma-informed and may not be able to support a client if they need to do extensive trauma work!
So what can we as coaches, therapists and guides do to ensure that we are taking on the clients we can help and referring out the clients whose specific needs are better met by other wellness professionals? This question arose during a conversation between myself and my previous coach Deepshikha Sairam the other day, and we decided that it ultimately boils down to integrity.
When you are a small business owner, it can be difficult to turn away clients, even those you may not be able to truly help. But by accepting clients you can’t fully support, you are doing a disservice to both them and the integrity of your coaching practice. The reality is that you will not be able to help everyone who crosses your path. So instead, cook the dish you have the ingredients for. Serve the people that you are designed for. Delight them with your work….and go home with your integrity intact.
Quotes
• “Chinese Medicine, instead, simply notes that emotions can affect the body and the physical body can affect the emotions. It’s a two-way street. You can become depressed because you’re injured and unable to really engage with life. It happened to me.” (2:49-3:04)
• “Just because [trauma and burnout] are closely linked, that does not make me a trauma-informed therapist.” (4:03-4:10)
• “As coaches, as people that work in a coaching space, what can we do within our own businesses to ensure that we are keeping people safe and that we aren’t taking on clients that need different support than we offer?....We decided it boils down to integrity. Do you feel safe enough in your business to turn people away that are willing to hire you because you know that they need different care than what you offer?” (6:49-7:24)
• “Just because someone gets on a call with you...that doesn’t mean you should sell them your services. Just because someone needs help, that doesn’t mean you have to be the one to help them. Our true service is showing up fully for those we are meant to serve and releasing people that are meant to be served by others who are in better alignment with what they need.” (10:59-11:22)
• “I am done proving myself and hitting above my weight. I know what I’m good at and what I’m not – and there’s no judgment about either of those. I love referring out and connecting with other professionals in similar (and even the same) spaces as I work in. I’ve even recommended that people go to other burnout coaches because they do something a little different than I do that is likely better suited to that person right now.” (15:22-15:49)
• “Coaches, therapists, guides….let’s normalize giving people the opportunity to work with exactly what they need. Let’s normalize centering the needs of the people that reach out for our help. Let’s normalize staying in our integrity and being honest about where our particular brand of genius is the most helpful. Let’s release the need to help everyone all the time and realize that we are not the only helpers. There are so many helpers out there, and each person deserves to find the humans that are perfect for their individual journeys.” (17:14-17:54)
Links
https://socialiquegroupe.lpages.co/quality-organic-leads-on-demand/
https://www.caitdonovan.com/newsletter-office-hours
Other Burnout Coaches I love:
https://www.caitdonovan.com/blog/10-burnout-professionals
Healing Generational Trauma:
https://khadijahtishan.com/work-with-me/
Akashic Record Readings:
https://www.akashicreadings.eu/
New Book by Martha Beck on Integrity:
https://amzn.to/2PaGogc
Peer Hopes:
https://peerhopes.com/
NOTE: Trauma informed therapists will generally be licensed by state and it will be important for you to find someone that is local, even if you’re working online. This page on Psychology Today will help you: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists/trauma-and-ptsd
Free Breakthrough Burnout Call with Cait
Podcast production and show notes provided by FIRESIDE Marketing
“I don’t have to live up to someone else’s expectations of how my brain should be wired,” explains Roxanne Jarrett, Coach for Entrepreneurs with ADHD. Although she realizes this now, Roxanne spent a great part of her life trying to compensate for her ADHD symptoms without ever having received a diagnosis. It wasn’t until more recently that Roxanne put a name to her lived experiences and started developing the supports she needs to avoid becoming burnt out.
Roxanne explains that adults with ADHD are four times more likely to suffer from depression than the general population for just this reason. Many are constantly trying to meet others’ expectations of what they “should” be, even though their neurology prevents them from neatly fitting into this prescribed box.
Roxanne now works as an artist and educator coaching creative entrepreneurs with ADHD. Her signature systems help to prevent burnout by giving motivated innovators the tools and techniques they need to launch their offerings with more joy and less stress. Roxanne says that nothing makes her happier than when her clients develop a “fuck-you” attitude and realize that they don’t have to behave like a neurotypical person in order to find fulfillment and feel joy.
Tune into this week’s episode of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast for a conversation with Roxanne and host Cait Donovan about ADHD and its connection to burnout. Learn why setting timers is an excellent strategy for individuals with ADHD (or anyone, honestly!), why your health is your real wealth, and why learning how to delegate is essential. As Roxanne explains, “Having more moments in your life that you enjoy, that thrill you – that’s your birthright.” This episode is the perfect introduction to several of the tools you need to get started on this path to fulfillment.
Quotes
• “I finally filled the order….made thousands of dollars. So great problem to have, right? It’s not that my stuff wouldn’t sell. And very promptly had a breakdown and ended up in the psychiatric hospital.” (8:17-8:41)
• “If success is gonna kill me, then maybe I don’t want it. But at the same time there was a big pining for things that I wanted to achieve. But then this thought that, well, maybe I just can’t hack it. Maybe I’m just not built to achieve the types of dreams that I have. My dreams are too big for me.” (12:17-12:37)
• “Being aware of the movement of time and how to measure it and how to look into the future to plan – that is a typical difficulty for people with ADHD.” (21:50-22:03)
• “If you are supremely interested in something, and you have ADHD, you can become so engrossed in it. There is no deficit of attention….But you might not realize how much time passed. That’s the issue.” (30:15-30:31)
• “Children with ADHD, by the time their childhood is over, they’ve been ‘corrected’ by adults at least 20,000 more times on average than a neurotypical child.” (32:13-32:28)
• “A diagnosis: it’s not an excuse, it’s an explanation. It’s a place to start, to start to understand how an ADHD brain works if that’s yours and how to live and how to thrive.” (33:44-34:08)
• “I love to see people with ADHD develop a ‘fuck you’ attitude…. ‘I don’t have to be like a neurotypical person, I don’t have to behave like a neurotypical person….And it’s ok to have the types of supports that I have.” (34:30-35:12)
• “Reach out and partner with people. Get accountability partners as much as you can. Until you’re able to delegate the things that you just don’t want to do, connect. And even when you’ve delegated, still connect. Just connect. We’re wired for that.” (41:07-41:28)
• “Having more moments in your life that you enjoy, that thrill you – that’s your birthright. So why go into business to bind yourself, to burden yourself with things that you don’t enjoy, right? Figure out a way to have more joyful moments….and realize a lot of times that ‘should’ is just a pattern of comparing yourself to other people, taking messages from your childhood, all types of stuff.” (47:10-47:53)
Links
IG: https://www.instagram.com/roxannejarrett/
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/roxannejarrett/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/RoxanneOnTheRox/
Free Road Map: https://www.swellhead.com/freeroadmap
roxannejarrett.com
XOXO,
C
If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait
Podcast production and show notes provided by FIRESIDE Marketing
Have you ever heard the saying, “If you love what you do, you’ll never work a day in your life?” Well, I can tell you from personal experience that this is often NOT the case.
This idea sent me down a 6-year path of feeling burnt out, but unable to admit it. I loved what I did, but I also felt tired, angry and worn down all the time. I spent years looking for what was wrong in my life rather than examining the needs of my mind, body and soul.
Then, I started hearing the word “burnout” pop up everywhere. At first, I didn’t even know what it meant. And after extensive research, what I learned was disheartening – that burnout belonged in hospitals to doctors and nurses and in corporations to high-level managers. Burnout didn’t apply to me, the female entrepreneur.
That’s when I started doing some more internal digging. And what I discovered was that burnout is ultimately caused by feelings of unworthiness. I didn’t feel deserving of true fulfillment, and so I never achieved it.
This started me on a journey of making small, manageable changes in my life to rediscover my self-love and self-worth. Four of the things that helped most me along the way were:
• Practicing small boundaries (like allowing myself to pee when I needed to!)
• Getting out of other people’s knots (Listen to the episode to learn about Knot Theory, and how it has radically changed my life.)
• Yoga nidra
• Regularly reviewing my values
My burnout journey taught me that recovery should be slow, gentle and kind. By acknowledging my basic needs and taking care of myself before always tending to others, my feelings of worthiness slowly started to build. When you start to care for yourself in a more authentic way, you AND everyone around you will benefit.
Lastly, I want to remind you that it is never too late to start the process of burnout recovery. No matter how burnt out you are, there is always an opportunity to re-establish your sense of worthiness. It’s all about taking small steps to remind your body, your mind and your spirit what true fulfillment feels like.
Quotes
• “In my own life, I felt like I had been sold a dream that sounded like this: ‘Work really hard, do your best, follow your heart, let your passions guide you and you’ll never feel like you’re working a day in your life.’ Have you ever heard that? The idea that if you love what you do, it’ll never feel like work? That idea sent me down a 6-year path of being burnt out and unable to admit it.” (2:06-2:32)
• “Burnout, when it’s not caused by workplace bullying, or poor company culture, is related to one underlying element: a feeling of unworthiness. It is impossible to allow fulfilling work to fulfill you if you don’t feel worthy of feeling full.” (4:49-5:15)
• “Small boundaries have nothing to do with another person. They are grace and generosity that I grant myself.” (6:19-6:28)
• “Self-care is necessary for the care of the whole and not selfish at all, as I previously viewed it….When you abandon yourself, you’re harming the people around you, too. You deserve to be cared for, you deserve your own attention, but other people also deserve you to have your own attention.” (10:37-11:01)
• “I thought I knew what my values were, but when I did an exercise to unveil MY core values, what I came up with was different than what I expected. I was living according to values that I had inherited, from both my family and my community. The rules and expectations I was following had nothing (or very little) to do with how I actually wanted to live my life. Getting reacquainted with my OWN values was eye-opening and now something I revisit to check in with regularly because they change, because I change, because the world changes!” (13:00-13:35)
• “My feelings of worthiness started to naturally build as a result of simply acknowledging my needs and allowing myself to meet them.” (15:02-15:15)
• “Recovering from burnout should be slow, gentle and kind. It is built of pebbles and stones instead of bricks and cement blocks. It is built of tiny moments of self-love and care and attention in between hours and days and weeks of self-doubt and questioning your value and your worthiness. It is constantly reminding yourself what IS your knot and what isn’t. It is checking in with your values over and over again and allowing yourself to make aligned decisions. It is saying more YES to yourself, so much so that you don’t automatically say yes to everyone else around you when they have a need that pops up. It is allowing space and time for your nervous system and brain to rest, to heal and to reset at a lower level of functioning, to allow yourself to go at your own internal speed limit instead of putting the pedal to the metal at all times.” (16:20-17:23)
Links
Free Breakthrough Burnout Call with Cait
Podcast production and show notes provided by FIRESIDE Marketing
Jennifer Cassetta first experienced burnout after a near death experience on September 11, 2001. At the time, she worked as an event planner at a loft downtown, located only three blocks south of the World Trade Center. On 9/11, she spent the morning frantically searching for shelter amongst smoke and ash, and finally found safety at her local dojo. In the months following, this dojo became the place where Jennifer was able to find the physical, mental, and spiritual grounding she needed to help her cope with her PTSD. After beginning to experience the incredible, multifaceted benefits of her HapKiDo practice, Jennifer decided to make a career out of helping others find similar empowerment through self-defense.
Unfortunately, 9/11 was not Jennifer’s only burnout story. Several years later, Jennifer was still living in New York City and experienced an emotionally traumatic breakup. As a result, she ultimately ended up moving out of NYC to California in order to create the distance and space she needed to heal. It was during this time that Jennifer realized the powerful ability of her martial arts practice to defend her from internal wounds.
Now, Jennifer is a speaker, author and consultant, who empowers audiences around the country through keynotes, self-defense and success coaching. Equipped with her 3rd degree black belt in HapKiDo, Master’s degree in Nutrition and NLP certification, Jennifer helps women release their inner warrior and feel strong, safe and confident from the streets to the boardroom. Jennifer’s first book, Hear Me Roar: How to Defend Your Mind, Body, and Heart against People Who Suck, employs personal anecdotes from her own life to inspire others to take back their power for a lifetime of health and happiness.
Tune into this week’s episode of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast for a conversation with Jennifer Cassetta about burnout, boundaries, and badassery. Learn how to find comfort in confrontation, when to move on from toxic relationships, and how to find compassion for ALL people, even the sucky ones.
Quotes
• “It became like this metaphor. All I wanted to do was go to that dojo. I started to feel all of these amazing benefits. Physically, my body was getting stronger; mentally, I started to feel more confident again; spiritually, I started to feel grounded and not just like hyper- hyper-sensitive. And I know looking back that that really saved me from gosh knows what else. Obviously, then, the story continues to build an entire career out of wanting to share those benefits, those mental, physical, spiritual benefits with as many people as I could. And the story continues to get me to now where I am speaking about it all over the country.” (6:32-7:13)
• “There’s a lot of principles in HapKiDo that are similar to an Aikido....which is more defensive strategies, basically taking on your opponent’s negative energy, not taking it on but blending with it and redirecting that energy either out into space or back at the attacker. Hapkido has those circular motions and also the ‘I’m gonna kick your ass afterwards.’ So there’s like a very nice balance of the soft and the hard.” (11:26-12:03)
• “Not everybody knows what your boundaries are. And to expect that is impossible, right? So sometimes a nice soft boundary, a nice reminder like, ‘Hey, what you just said, it makes me feel like this. Was that your intention?’ So a softer block can be a redirect of that energy, asking a question, bouncing back a question to the other person, holding their gaze, waiting for an answer, which holds them accountable is an interaction which is soft, yet powerful at the same time. And I think those types of interactions are really important.” (13:47-14:23)
• “Now in my self-defense classes, I teach people if people are going to be overstepping your boundaries or a person, place or thing is sucking your energy dry from you, you have two strategies essentially: create distance and space or communicate what your boundaries are.” (26:55-27:13)
• “How I teach people to (and how I do it myself obviously) set a state is to go back, think of a time when you were in that state. So let’s pick confidence. Think of a time where you felt like a total rockstar – confident, badass, whatever it was – and then look around, see what you’re seeing, hear what you’re hearing, feel what you’re feeling, and really embody that emotion, that state….really get into your body and anchor it there.” (37:25-38:03)
• “When we’re headed for burnout, if we remain in our heads, you’re gonna spiral into the burnout. And the connecting of the mind, body and spirit is the only way out.” (50:35-50:47)
Links
https://instagram.com/jenncassetta
https://www.linkedin.com/in/jennifer-cassetta/
https://facebook.com/JenniferCassetta
https://jennifercassetta.com/confidence-course/
XOXO,
C
If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait
Podcast production and show notes provided by FIRESIDE Marketing
Today, I’m flipping the script and talking about “Other Care” as part of your self-care plan. And before you get your panties in a bunch, I don’t mean taking care of others. I mean letting and paying others to take care of you!
While there is plenty of advice out there about when to hire a virtual assistant, freeing up time in your schedule often isn’t enough! What about the parts of your life beyond work that need a little TLC? Aren’t there other things that you should be delegating out in order to feel more fulfilled?
Unfortunately, I think that there is this new understanding of “self-care” as something you need to do alone. And while self-care is healthy and essential (for me, it’s taking midday baths and taking walks with my dog Flora!), it shouldn’t have to be yet another thing we have to do ourselves.
That’s why this episode is dedicated to what I call “other care” or allowing others to help us heal, relax, and find fulfillment. As an acupuncturist, I have supported thousands of people in their “other care.” The energy and positive intention that we share in a room together creates a healing environment even before any acupuncture occurs! If you’re interested in finding out how that works on an energetic and scientific level, I highly recommend the book Energy Medicine by Jill Blakeway.
Recently, I have found “other care” by returning to acupuncture as a patient. I found an incredible acupuncturist – Kelly Drury in Montclair, NJ – who is supporting me in ways that I can’t support myself. Another healer that has helped me tremendously is Lindsey from La Lune Healing. Lindsay is a reiki practitioner who helped me sleep again after many sleepless nights following my achilles surgery. Salutogenesis Chiropractic is yet another group of healers that I am able to receive “other care” from as soon as I start feeling out of alignment.
Having a healer that you know and trust is essential, no matter who you are. It is especially important for those experiencing burnout, because it’s often easier to let others start doing the work of filling you up when you are incredibly depleted.
I’d love to start celebrating Other Care. I want you to comment on any post this week from this episode and tag your healer. Let’s get their work out there. Let’s tell each other that it’s okay to have background support that isn’t DIRECTLY related to business activities. Let’s normalize outsourcing a portion of healing and stop feeling like we are responsible for ALL the things, ALL the time.
Quotes
• “I believe that as entrepreneurs who are focused on both earning a great income and making a great impact on the world, we need to fill our cups as often as possible. Hiring a VA will take some tasks away, take some things off your plate, and make the liquid in your cup drop slower, but it won’t FILL it back up.” (2:42-3:02)
• “We’ve seemingly put self-care in yet another category of ‘things we must do ourselves.’ But what if the thing that fills you up most actually comes from allowing someone else to hold space for you, to create a healing environment for you, to support your energy, to fill your cup, so you can go on and change the world the way you imagine?” (3:25-3:48)
• “The energy we share in a room together really does make a difference. When you allow someone to create a healing space for you, your body enters a parasympathetic nervous state BEFORE any treatment even happens – that means you’re healing before your healer even does anything because of energy and intention.” (3:57-4:19)
• “I don’t have to be in charge of my care. I have to be involved. I’ve got to show up, I’ve got to pay, I’ve got to make appointments, I’ve got to follow her instructions. But I don’t have to ‘own the task.’ I’ve handed that part over.” (4:47-5:01)
• “Having a healer that you know and trust, no matter what their modality, is so important. In fact, I suggest to nearly all my burnout coaching clients that they start working with someone at the same time as they start their coaching because especially when you’re burnt out you need to leave the filling of your cup to other people.” (5:39-6:00)
Links
Free Breakthrough Burnout Call with Cait
Energy Medicine by Jill Blakeway
Can’t wait to celebrate the healers this week.
<3,
C
Podcast production and show notes provided by FIRESIDE Marketing
Dr. Nan Nuessle first realized she was burnt out when she stopped at a stop sign and waited for it to turn green. She didn't even process what she was waiting for until the truck behind her honked. At the time, Dr. Nan was working up to 110 hours per week, chairing the Department of Pediatrics at both a large, multidisciplinary clinic AND a nearby hospital, and raising two children with a husband who wasn't pulling his weight. After realizing how burnt out she had become, Dr. Nan approached the Chief Medical Officer at her clinic and expressed her concerns...only to be told, "Well, what are you going to do about it?" Despite the incredible amount of hours and effort Dr. Nan was putting into her job, she still met with backlash when she sought some basic support.
After this experience, Dr. Nan became a locum physician or traveling physician. This new role helped relieve some of the stress that had been suffocating her in previous positions, since she didn’t feel the same crushing responsibility to keep her employer happy at her own expense. However, throughout her travels, Dr. Nan began to realize how rampant bullying was in the healthcare world. Disguised as “politics,” physicians everywhere were bullied back into line if they ever defied the demands of their administration. This inspired Dr. Nan to begin combating bullying at the organizational level. She founded her own company, Beat Down Burnout, which works to address bullying and burnout from a standpoint of communication, so everyone at a given workplace can feel like a valued member of their team.
Tune into this week’s episode of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast to learn more about how Dr. Nan works to reduce bullying in the workplace using the B.A.N.K. system of Personality Science. We discuss working with narcissists, the benefits and uses of meditation, and how to incorporate the principles of conflict resolution into all of your relationships, so you can meet people where they are.
Quotes
• “I first realized I was burnt out when I was driving home post-call, and I stopped at a four-way stop, and I waited for the sign to turn green.” (1:26-1:35)
• “I went in to speak with the Chief Medical Officer at the clinic and told him, ‘I think I’m burnt out.’ And he looked at me and said, ‘Well, what are you gonna do about it?’” (2:21-2:29)
• “Everywhere I went, I saw bullying….Any time a physician stepped out of line of what administration wanted, these physicians were bullied back into line, myself included.” (8:09-8:28)
• “80% of what occurs with burnout occurs at the organizational level.” (9:51-9:55)
• “[Bullying] is both communication and action that doesn’t value the speaker or the listener, and it’s also communication and action that singles a person out to be treated differently.” (12:02-12:13)
• “When I have a patient that I want to do something with that is not what the nurses and the staff are used to doing, I have to go print up three articles that show why it’s going to work….This drives me nuts because I just want to go do it...but I do, every time.” (32:32-33:33)
• “With this training, I have learned a lot of tools to protect myself. I have learned to do what we call ‘be the cloud.’ So when somebody wants to be a narcissist, you learn to just let it flow through you and go on and be able to do your work. You have to learn at what point you just can’t. But that’s probably 25% [of the time] not 80%.” (38:10-38:39)
• “Once you’ve been bullied, you become highly sensitive about it. And you sometimes need to know where to go to rebuild your strength, to rebuild your walls, to get the tools to get back to normal. And that’s hard.” (40:33-40:54)
• “The Hawaiians have an attitude about the guy that cuts you off in traffic. They say, ‘If you don’t let at least two people in on your way to work and at least two people in on your way home, you’re not driving with aloha.’” (43:35-43:47)
Links
Dr. Nan’s website: https://BeatDownBurnout.com
Dr. Nan’s Instagram: https://instagram.com/beat_down_burnout
Dr. Nan’s LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/nanette-nuessle-md-351b9116/
Crack your code: https://CrackMyCode.com/Beat-Burnout
XOXO,
C
If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait
Podcast production and show notes provided by FIRESIDE Marketing
Hey Fried Fans,
This week’s episode has been a long time coming and something that I’ve thought a lot about over the years.
It’s about privilege and the good and bad of how it’s interwoven with burnout.
It is extremely difficult for people that I grew up with to accept that they are the recipients of any sort of privilege and I understand why. Fall River, Massachusetts isn’t a city that dreams are made of. Our police motto is “We’ll Try” and we’ve been high on the list of most heroin per capita since long before the opioid epidemic. It is a downtrodden place that comes with an extreme sense of pride - that pride sometimes feels like the only thing that keeps the city going.
Most families I knew growing up, including my own, struggled to make ends meet, often working multiple jobs to keep the lights on and food in the fridge. Having this as your lifestyle and acknowledging your privilege is a big ask. There is no room for feeling privileged or worrying about how others are disadvantaged when you’re simply trying to survive yourself.
Maslow’s hierarchy of needs tells us that unless basic needs are met (basic being defined as: food, shelter, drink, clothing, warmth, and some level of stability) it is nearly impossible to expect anyone to be reaching toward ‘higher’ ideals such as self-actualization and personal growth. I believe that it is in this area of personal growth that one can begin to identify one’s privilege.
At least, that’s how it worked for me.
It wasn’t until I was highly successful that I was able to turn around and realize that my life was easier because of the following factors:
- White Skin
- A 2 parent home
- Supportive, involved parents that encouraged reading and education
- A large, well connected extended family
- A close circle of friends around my parents
- Always having enough food, a place to live, clean clothes, and heat in the winter
- Cis gendered
- In a hetero relationship
- Able-bodied
- Sporty physique
None of those things prevented me from burning out. They did make it easier for me to find help when I was burnt out AND they kept me on a burnout cycle because I was comparing my life situation to lives around me and taking note of my luck and my privilege.
It lead to increased feelings of guilt and shame (which burnout has enough of in and of itself) and a lot of beating myself up for not appreciating what I had more, for not being grateful enough, for not using everything I was gifted with to create a life that was fulfilling to me and useful to others.
I believe strongly in recognizing my privilege. I think it’s important because it helps to remind me to leave a piece of my ego at the door. No matter what I’ve accomplished, there have always been things that gave me an edge. It helps me to both take credit for my work AND rest on the fact that it wasn’t ‘all me’.
Back to burnout. When you read the research on burnout, it’s mostly been studied in corporate and hospital settings (read: settings that prefer white skin) and the result of said studies is that the environment, the company, the hospital - is at 80% fault for causing burnout.
When I did my own research, at the bottom, in the depths of what I truly believe sits behind burnout is trauma. Trauma that causes nervous systems to be on high alert which leads to behaviors that burn us out. It doesn’t have to be one singular traumatic event that an after school special would be made about - it can be an adult with unstable and inconsistent emotional states, it can be a constant cutting down of your self worth through comments about your clothes, style, way of being, body, it can be emotional disconnection and abandonment - even from parents that were physically there. It can be a society that thinks of you as less than. It can be living in skin that makes you more likely to be not believed by medical professionals and more likely to be violently attacked/killed by the people whose job it is to protect you. It can be a sexual orientation or a gender that leaves you at risk for familial/societal/religious rejection.
Every single aspect of your life that makes you unsafe: Mentally, physically, and emotionally - can lead to burnout.
So yes, recognize your privilege and also pay attention to what created a lack of safety in your life, at any stage. Recognize your privilege and also give yourself the space for grace and the right to heal. Recognize your privilege and acknowledge your burnout - because you healing your nervous system will affect everyone you come into contact with. Adding more regulated nervous systems to the world raises us all up - the more regulated we are, the less likely we are to create more trauma for others - the more likely we are to recognize another’s pain and take action toward solving it.
If you’re privileged and burnt out - Please know this: Recognizing and healing your burnout helps you AND all of us. You deserve to heal no matter how ‘good’ you’ve got it.
If you’re lacking privilege and you’re burnt out - Please know this: you are seen, heard, acknowledged, and loved. Your healing, too, is all of our healing. You deserve to heal, no matter who has told you differently.
If you want to listen to an episode on Burnout and Racism, please go listen to the episode that I recorded with Khadijah Tishan Washington.
We all need to bring our regulated nervous systems to the world so that the world can start to heal.
If you’re burnt out and you’re denying it because you’re privileged: book a call now. Let’s get started healing.
If you’re burnt out and you’re underprivileged and coaching is out of your range: book a call now. Let’s get started healing.
There is a group called Peer Hopes, you can find them at https://peerhopes.com, that offers low cost 1:1 and group counseling.
You all deserve to heal.
<3
XOXO
C
If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait
Episode summary: Dana Inouye is an empowerment coach (and hot-mess mom of 4). She works with creative women and rebellious leaders who know they're meant for more but are stuck in spirals of overthinking and people-pleasing. She helps women connect to the bigger part inside of them (their "inner wild") and seduce their dreams, so that they can show up bigger, emboldened, epically expressed, and anchored in their power. Dana has developed a groundbreaking REWILDING process that merges mindset and embodiment and activates emotions. She maintains that we can't think our way to results, we've gotta FEEL it.
We talked about rage, the all elusive balance, and the tender moments that happen when you allow yourself to be honest.
Discussed in this episode:
- Kids are with you all the f*ing time (especially now) [4:10]
- Lightbulb moments in the shower [6:47]
- Hunkering down for windows of time as an entrepreneur mom [8:51]
- The push and pull of motherhood [12:25]
- Magic in the mess [17:26]
- Being honest about emotions and being able to rant [22:14 ]
- Kids, anger, screaming, and emotional balance [27:37]
- Reframing as a tool for freedom [36:30]
- The 3P Framework: Pleasure, Power, and Possibility [40:21]
- You’re Fine, and so are your kids [48:12]
Find Dana: http://danainouye.com/
Links Mentioned in Show
The Bouncebackability Factor: bit.ly/bouncebackorder
The Resentment Journal Mini Course: https://caitdonovan.com/resentment-journal
XOXO
C
If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait
- the quality or state of being conscious or aware of something.
- a mental state achieved by focusing one's awareness on the present moment, while calmly acknowledging and accepting one's feelings, thoughts, and bodily sensations, used as a therapeutic technique.
Episode summary: Christina Vuleta, co-founder of MINDALT - a mood altering deodorant, joins me on this episode to share her story AND to announce a joint venture that we are so excited about. Christina’s idea to create The World’s Most Mindful Office is coming to life thanks to partnerships with, well, myself :), Luminary - an amazing co-working space in NYC, Caveday - facilitated Deep Focus Sessions, Sochill.io - Mindfulness meditation, Spiritune - music therapy to help you reach your goals and more!
Including more mindful moments in your day is an important part of staying in touch with your needs and therefore avoiding burnout. In a time when our dining room tables became offices and the lines got blurred between work and home, we need a moment to stop, collect our thoughts, and create more mindful spaces for ourselves.
Topics discussed in this episode:
- The New York City Rush & Eating Breakfast [5:43]
- Making Everyday Things into Intentional Rituals [9:20]
- MINDALT’s story: Smell, Swipe, Smile [10:28]
- MINDALT’s WHY: Being In A Better Mood, Easily [13:43]
- What Do You Need MORE of: Mindfulness, Focus, Calm, Energy [15:35]
- Kristina Libby Floral Artist [18:52]
- Luminary and Cate Luzio (1204 Broadway, NOMAD, NYC) [19:45]
- Caveday - Provide the Focus Break [20:59]
- INVITE! The World’s Most Mindful Office [22:28]
- Creating Mindful Moments [24:19]
- Checking in with YOUR Needs, and Meeting Them In The Mindful Office [28:29]
- Checking in with YOUR Needs, and Meeting Them In YOUR Office [30:27]
- Additional Programming about Mindfulness throughout the Month of April! Check out Luminary’s Event page for more [32:44]
- Book a day in the mindful office and WIN a gift basket full of amazing products from Luminary Members! [34:53]
If you love the idea of having an entire working day that is designed to help you focus, be more mindful, more productive, and end the day with more energy and more calm, we want you to book your day in The World’s Most Mindful Office!
Luminary Members can book a full day in the office for just $20, and non members for just $40.
This is an amazing way to create a beautiful day for yourself during stress awareness month and get inspired to increase the mindfulness of your own office!
ALSO - When you are one of the lucky people to book a day in The World’s Most Mindful Office, you will be entered into a raffle for an amazing gift basket to be given away at the end of the month full of amazing products by Luminary Members. (List included Below
RESERVE YOUR DAY IN THE WORLD'S MOST MINDFUL OFFICE
Get The Best Acupressure Point For Inducing Calm Here!
Get the Desk Mat Cait Mentioned
Partners
Caveday: https://www.caveday.org/
Sochill.io: https://sochill.io/
Spiritune: https://spiritune.com
Products In The Gift Basket:
CBD Gummies from: https://calmbetterdays.co/shop/
Yoga Mat Spray from: https://www.bubblymoonnaturals.com/
Eye Pillow from: https://lalunehealing.com
‘Wisdom’ Body Butter from: https://www.seazensoap.com/
Reusable gift bags from: https://goodgoodsstore.co/
Luxury 'Bliss' Tea by Nirogam Ayurveda from: https://sanghanyc.com
MINDALT** deodorant: https://mindalt.co
**GET 10% off with the code FRIED!!!!!**
Hey Fried Fans,
Once in a while, something really gets my goat and I use that as my guide to share what’s on my mind because I know that if it didn’t matter to me, it wouldn’t get my goat - and if it matters to me, it’s likely to matter to you too. (I think).
Someone wrote a Linkedin post that was really great about being okay with having fear and how it’s damaging in the world of coaching and therapy to try to talk people out of how they feel and instead tell them how they should feel. I totally agree. Your reality is yours. Your emotions are real and they count - no matter what you or anyone else thinks you should feel.
So, what got my goat? A commenter. A commenter who said she, and I quote,
“Likes to stay HIGH VIBE, so she stays away from things like FEAR”.
Everybody, turn the volume up a little, and lean in as if you’re about to listen REALLY WELL to what I am about to say:
Normal human responses to life situations don’t make you LOW VIBE. You don’t ‘damage’ your vibrations by experiencing normal human emotions. Now, I’m going to get sciency for a minute because this is one of those instances where what is being said is true and untrue. Changes in emotional states, do actually change your vibrational level - plenty of studies show this. When the neurotransmitters that are related to fear enter a cell, they have a different effect than the neurotransmitters that are related to joy. Those related to fear create more dissonance and chaos and those related to joy bring more resonance and harmony.
But that doesn’t mean that feeling fear during the day is ‘damaging your vibe’. In the same way that small amounts of cortisol (the stress hormone) are good and health enhancing for your body, Chinese medicine has said for 1000’s of years that all emotions in moderation are health promoting. This makes sense because we’d get rid of emotions altogether if they weren’t an efficient way to guide us. The body is designed to be maximally efficient, so it’s best to assume that the bits and pieces it uses to function are necessary and useful.
Here at FRIED we talk a lot about creating space to feel whatever emotions are coming up, in The Bouncebackability Factor, I wrote about a concept called ‘sitting in the muck’, and my intention behind it was to give you permission to FEEL ALL THE FEELS. I have found this to be a massive healing measure that I needed in my own life and I have plenty of clients that agree with this. I even have a course that FOCUSES on resentment because I have seen it proven to me time and time again that when we have permission to dip into tough emotions and a safe structure within which to do so, we can move through and transform these emotions and bring ourselves closer to harmony.
So, all that being said - what does “damage your vibe”? Ignoring, not processing, or otherwise sidestepping difficult emotions. This is called spiritual bypassing and it is all about pretending like the tough stuff doesn’t exist and focusing on “only the good” and “only high vibes”. It’s not healthy, nor is it normal.
Chinese medicine teaches us that every single emotion we have helps our body to work as it should. The Liver uses the combo of anger, frustration, and compassion and the Heart uses joy and anxiety, the Spleen uses contemplation and worry, the Kidneys use courage and fear, the Lungs use grief, sorrow, and empathy. When an organ system is overloaded, the ‘negative’ emotion can get stuck and when a negative emotion is stuck, an organ system can be overloaded - these are the only scenarios where the effect of an emotion can create a low vibe - not because it’s happened but because it’s stuck.
On the same token, overuse of the ‘positive’ emotions is also considered bad in Chinese medicine. Too much joy leads to mania, too much courage can be physically dangerous, too much empathy and compassion blurs our boundaries, too much contemplation leads to inaction.
The world of life coaching and mindset work has a bit of growing up to do. Maintaining an ideal that you must feel all good all the time and ‘keep your vibes high’ keeps you separate from living a real human experience, leaves you at risk for leaving old, unprocessed emotions in your body that can turn into physical issues later in life, and puts you in a position of moral superiority where you walk around telling everyone that if they just ‘raised their vibe’ their whole lives would be better.
It allows you to ignore real world problems like racism, sexism, ageism, ableism, homophobia, transphobia, and more. When you’re ‘above all that’, you put yourself above other humans. You’ve dissociated yourself and therefore you’re not contributing to solving the problems that are right here and right now.
That being said, I believe in meditating and focusing on love when you’re capable and that’s real for you. I believe in finding the good in your life on purpose if you aren’t currently sitting in the muck. I believe in your ability to use the highs and lows of life equally. There are studies that show that a large number of meditators, working together in a community will actually change the overall feel of it. Energy matters, and it works, and focusing on the good on purpose works - as long as you aren’t lying. As long as you can still allow yourself to grieve when someone dies, to be angry when your safety is threatened, to have fear in the unknown that scares you.
If you’re burnt out and someone has told you to go ‘high vibe’ recently - you can ignore them. Permission granted. Whatever it is that you’re feeling, you’re allowed. When you’re done feeling that way, when you’re sick of sitting in the muck, when you’ve had enough and are ready to change the story, I’m here. Until then, be where you are. Don’t worry about your vibe. You’ll get to the point where transformation is a necessity and when you do, you’ll find the right people to help you.
And you will heal.
And after you heal, you’ll still have some shitty feeling days sometimes. Because you’re still living a human experience. And that’s okay too.
Love you.
XO
C
Need some help balancing all the madness and sick of being angry at everyone around you? Book a call! bit.ly/callcait
If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait
Episode summary: In this episode, guest Catherine Peters, a transformational life coach takes us through her learning-to-be-pro-nap journey. She dishes out the science behind why naps matter, what time of day is best, and how long the ideal nap is according to the researching nerds (we LOVE researching nerds!). On top of all of that, she’s created a Napping Workshop just for you! Sign up here: www.eventbrite.com/e/138106352819/?discount=burnout
Keep your notebooks out for this one, you’ll want to write a few things down to help improve your relationship to the nap.
Topics discussed in this episode:
- Burning Out During A Passion Project [5:06]
- A Cancer Diagnosis and a Lightbulb Moment Around Risk Factors [7:27]
- Beginning the Journey To Perfect The Nap [13:56]
- Get In Touch With Your Nap Story [23:18]
- The Science Behind Shut Eye [27:10]
- The Willpower Myth [31:00]
- How And When To Nap [34:49]
- Setting The Stage and Creating Your Nap Ritual & Nap Kit [42:13]
- Safety and Napping [47:43]
- Eye/Sleep Masks by La Lune Healing [50:27]
Find Catherine:
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/cpeterscoaching/
Catherine’s Website: https://www.cpeterscoaching.com
Napping Workshop (MARCH 4th, 2021!) www.eventbrite.com/e/138106352819/?discount=burnout
Cait’s Yoga Nidra Meditation:
https://www.friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/post/sfc-meditation-nervous-system
*When you do that, I get a small percentage of the sale. All proceeds are used to keep FRIED up and running!
Hey FRIED Fans!
I had an amazing question from a fan on IG a couple weeks ago that I wanted to answer. Shout out to @vitalitahealth on Instagram for this great Q!
She asked what to do when you find yourself in a burnout relapse. When someone asks a really great question, I always like to let it roll around in my head for awhile before I decide on an answer.
After rolling this one around for a few weeks, I have a counter question:
Is it a burnout relapse, or have you been burnt out this whole time?
When I wrote The Bouncebackability Factor (which you can snag on amazon if you haven’t gotten it yet!), I wrote that I burnt out two separate times. Since writing it, I’ve realized that I didn’t actually burn out two separate times, I was actually weaving in and out of burnout for 6 or 7 years.
There were times that I felt better, for sure, but there weren’t too many times that I felt safe when I felt bad. When I say that, what I mean is - every time I felt bad or had a down day, I was nervous that it would last forever. I judged myself for feeling that way again. I thought about all the things I did to help myself and would get really discouraged that I was having a bad day.
Wasn’t I doing enough? Why wasn’t it working? Why couldn’t I control this? Don’t I know better by now?
Let’s compare and contrast this with what happens now when I have a bad day (because bad days still happen, I’m human! Burnout recovery does not guarantee you to have #allgooddaysallthetime). Now, when I have a bad day, I feel secure in my ability to get the care I need to get back to neutral within a decent amount of time.
Sometimes that means some type of grooming self care, sometimes that means getting an acupuncture appointment or a reiki appointment, sometimes it means shutting down social media for a few days, sometimes it means chatting with friends or visiting family.
The major difference is: I don’t feel unsafe, bad, guilty, wrong, or inadequate when I have a bad day. It’s just information. My body/brain/spirit need some extra love - it doesn’t even matter why, it just matters that I got the memo and can respond.
If you feel like you’re relapsing, the question you should ask yourself are:
Is this really a relapse or have I been burnt out this whole time?
If you feel like you truly recovered previously and you are actually having a relapse, the first thing you do is reach out for help. The best option is to put yourself in someone else’s care as soon as possible. When you’re burnt out, self-healing is so much harder because not only is your cup empty, but it’s likely also cracked. So, you might find yourself doing all. the. things. but not getting the results you want. We’ve all heard that you can’t pour from an empty cup, you also can’t fill your own empty cracked cup without outside help.
That outside help could be: therapy, Chinese medicine (acupuncture/herbs) reiki, coaching, somatic healing, rtt, hypnosis, massage, or any number of other techniques. Here’s what is most important when choosing them:
- You want to do it.
- There is another person in the room (even zoom room), helping to create a healing space. Other people’s energy MATTERS when you’re healing from burnout. End of story. If you want to know more about people creating healing spaces, I recommend the book Energy Medicine by Jill Blakeway.
- While it’s happening, you are focused on it and nothing else. Right now, it can be hard to go places to get help with restrictions still in place in many cities, but you can get assistance online - just be sure that your do not disturb is enabled and you’re not checked FB during your healing time (yeah, I see you ;))
If you feel like the truth is that you’ve actually been burnt out this whole time, the same advice applies. Reach out for help. The reason that asking the question is important isn’t that the advice is different, it’s that it makes you feel right with yourself. You understand what you’re undertaking. You know what to tell the practitioner that you’re working with. It’s always easier to move forward from clarity and it’s always easier to heal with honesty.
I hope this was helpful, my beautiful FRIED Fans. As I wrap up this week’s episode, I want to remind you that subscribes, reviews, and shares make FRIED’s world go round! I am so grateful for the support you show FRIED week in an d week out! Listen to this review:
@campchristy stays: This podcast is the greatest gift. I am in the throws of burnout and have just now really accepted it. And that it is physical, not just being tired and sick. Thank you. P.S. I listen to podcasts all the time. This is the first written review I’ve given. It has impacted me that much.
If you want your review read on FRIED, be sure to leave the review, screenshot it and email it to me at friedtheburnoutpodcast @ gmail . com!
Until next time!
Episode summary: In this episode, guest Beth Russell, a colleague in the world of Chinese medicine joins us to talk about optimizing our home health routines. Beth Griffing Russell is an acupuncturist and specialist in facial renewal practices using Traditional East Asian Medicine. She helps people of all ages reconnect with their brilliant vitality through a variety of techniques that can be performed at home. Beth's goal is to uplift faces and spirits and on this episode, she will explain the connection between the skin and the nervous system, relaxing the muscles of the neck and burnout, and what fear and sitting at our computers have in common.
You’ll finish this episode with plenty of take aways - you might even notice that you’re sitting up straighter and your eyes are a little brighter (that’s a hint meant to tell you that you’ll be guided through some at home facial toning techniques!).
Topics discussed in this episode:
- Skin Disorders Representing Fear [5:57]
- A Mountain Lion Encounter [7:45]
- The Connection Between Fear and Neck Tension [11:15]
- Neural Feedback Patterns/Stress/Safety [15:52]
- Wrinkles Are About Efficiency [17:02]
- Relax Your Neck to Free Your Facial Expressions [20:10]
- Thai Herbal Compresses for Massage [23:50]
- An Intro to Facial Gua Sha [27:46]
- Not Just About Beauty, These Techniques Make You Smarter and More Focused [34:41]
- Get Started With These Techniques At Home Right Now [36:19]
- Mental Squeegee Technique [40:35]
- Let Gentleness Permeate Your Life [50:55]
Find Beth:
Instagram: https://instagram.com/studio_sappan (THE BEST VIDEOS on facial self care!)
Beth’s Website: https://thtpdx.com/collections (Snag your Thai Herbal Compress for neck massage here!)
If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait
As a FRIED listener, you get 20% off!* Incann CBD products. They just released a Sleep Formula that I'm dying to try myself!
*Use the code FRIED for 20% off! When you do that, I get a small percentage of the sale. All proceeds are used to keep FRIED up and running!
Is anyone else on clubhouse yet? On one hand it feels like an extra thing to do, but on another, it leaves space for some really great conversations. Last week, I was invited to co-moderate a room on Physician Burnout and the conversation and some of the points made were genius. I took 5 pages of notes while I was listening to the other speakers. And yet, the whole time I was on the call, something was bothering me and I didn’t nail down what it was until I was talking to my husband about it post call.
All of the burnout research tells us that organizations are up to 80% responsible for burnout. That means that all of the energy that is going into solving burnout is slated toward organizational change. Within that, people that do the work related to organizational change often judge those of us that are focusing on individual wellness because we are, and I quote, not seeing the true problem.
Here’s the TRUE problem in my eyes. Organizational change HAS to happen. I am SO HERE FOR IT and I am so thrilled people smarter than me at organizational development are working on it. That, however, doesn’t change the fact that people are burnt out right now and they deserve the chance to heal.
Fixing the organizations will go a long way toward #endingburnoutculture, but in the meantime, we still need to treat burnout like a true diagnosis and help people HEAL. We don’t have time to wait for organizational change. Any other diagnosis is treated differently. Heart disease is a huge issue - partially because of genetics, but largely because of food. So, that means the organizational change that needs to happen is a restructuring of food, the FDA, advertising, education about diet and exercise, etc. And all that needs to happen. But that doesn’t mean we’re going to stop doing bypasses in the meantime.
Where are the bypasses for my burnt out folk?
Treating burnout is hard because:
- There’s no concrete set of symptoms that lead to a concrete burnout diagnosis
- Chronic stress leads to brain changes that require lifestyle shifts to regrow
- Every single episode of it is different
- It requires a multidisciplinary approach. We must deal with the nervous system, the endocrine system, the immune system, and more.
- People still doubt that they have it and even if they choose to recognize it in their own lives, most other people don’t really understand how terrible it feels so there isn’t a lot of compassion
That is why it is so crucial to work with someone who can guide you through it - to help you find the most impactful actions so that you don’t spend energy that you don’t have on solutions that don’t work. I am obsessed with doing this with you. I love watching the process unfold. I love holding space for you while it all happens. I love the SHOCK that happens when you realize that 3 months have passed and you’re still very much the same person - but you feel SO MUCH BETTER.
In the online business world, there is always talk about nailing down your messaging. Being sure that the people you are talking to know that you are talking to them - and when I started burnout coaching in 2017, I thought it was obvious to everyone that burnout was burnout and I could help them with it. Then, 2020 happened and burnout started to get niched down even further. There are people that only talk to organizations. There are people that do all somatic processing. There are people who use functional medicine, Chinese medicine, reiki, and/or coaching.
Here’s what I learned about myself and my work during that clubhouse room last week: My niche is helping you heal from burnout - using boundaries, systems, and emotional transformations. By helping you to uncover truths about yourself, by giving you permission to have things be easier, by teaching you to ask for help, by getting you to a place where you’re being REALLY HONEST with yourself - by giving you communication patterns, specific words to use when building boundaries, and carrying the belief in your healing for you until you’re ready to hold it yourself.
Even when I’m prepping workshops for corporations, for 100 or 400 people, I’m thinking about you as an individual - not because burnout is your fault and not because they’re aren’t systems in play that contributed to your burnout - but because in spite of those things, you still deserve to heal, you need to heal, and in order to do that, we need to focus on what we can control.
So we do, and as our time together unfolds, I cry with joy and I feel so much pride for you. I love accompanying you on the journey from angry, tired, burnt out, and hating everyone to energized, present, engaged in your life, and enjoying people again.
If it's time for you to end the burnout cycle in your own life, I'm here, at the ready. Book a free consult. There's literally nothing to lose. bit.ly/callcait
If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait
Episode summary: In this episode, guest Elizabeth Lott, a pastor at a progressive Baptist Congregation in New Orleans starts out with a story - one that you might not expect from a pastor - one of Mardi Gras, sequined shoes, and a fall that lead to broken teeth and concussions. From there we journeyed on together through allowing yourself to be called to a vocation and yet leaving space to be called further when it is time to move forward. It is a story full of expansion, support, and hope for what we can all create in the ‘new’ post covid world that we hope is coming real soon.
Topics discussed in this episode:
- The Love of Mardi Gras: A Story of Change [3:00]
- Being convinced that alone is the way [17:39]
- The power, pressure, and magical thinking of a Calling [21:24]
- Leaving curiosity and taking on ‘traditional’ expectations [24:21]
- Disappointing people on the scale of the internet [29:15]
- “What would happen if one woman told the truth about her life” Muriel Rukeyser [36:28]
- Being vulnerable as a leader [42:16]
- Sharing struggles within your relationship [48:18]
- Leaving a container when you’ve outgrown it [54:52]
Find Elizabeth:
https://www.elizabethlott.com
IG: https://www.instagram.com/elizabethmlott
Resources Mentioned in the Show:
Muriel Rukeyser
My fave CBD is Incann and as a FRIED listener, you get 20% off!* Check out their Bio Soothe CBD Salve - it’s my fave for sore muscles and neck tension!
*Use the code FRIED for 20% off! When you do that, I get a small percentage of the sale. All proceeds are used to keep FRIED up and running!
Hi FRIED fans,
I started a FB post this week with: “Didja hear it? The collective sigh?” And then deleted it and posted something else, probably about a bird beak face mask, or Michelle Obama’s belt. An hour or two later, my fave business coach Deepshikha Saraim posted nearly the same message with the words: “Collective sigh” in it.
Collective sigh. Even as I type it, I take a deeper breath and let it out noisily. Sighing, in Chinese medicine, is a sign of and treatment of Liver Qi Stagnation (don’t worry, I’ll explain).
Liver Qi Stagnation is a Chinese medical diagnosis that happens when there have been an avalanche of emotions that your body simply cannot process, when this happens - the unprocessed emotions are stored in the Liver system (this doesn’t mean the actual ORGAN - the system in Chinese medicine includes the organ, it’s energy, it’s function, it’s energetic pair the Gall Bladder, and it’s meridians or channel pathways that carry its energy, it’s physicality, emotionality, and spirituality).
When too many unprocessed emotions are sitting in the Liver system, they create an energetic and emotional traffic jam and sighing is one of the ways the body tries to push the energy through the Liver, to help those emotions move a little better, move a little more, and make room for clear traffic.
So, if you found yourself releasing a big sigh this week, my encouragement would be to intentionally release a few more. Sigh on purpose. With Intentionality. Sigh with your friends. Sigh on Zoom. Keep this energy moving out. Having an outward threat end does not automatically mean the built up emotions of the past era have been processed. It means they are sitting there, waiting for your help.
Now is the time to return to your body. To care for it. To move through emotional patterns. It means MORE discomfort just when we are looking to have some ease, but it’s worth it because when we avoid this process, it ends up biting us in the ass. Here are some of the symptoms that Chinese medicine relates to the Liver energy being stuck:
Indigestion
Stomach pain
Depression
Sighing
Hiccups
Easily Frustrated
Explosive/Inappropriate Anger
Plum Pit Qi (a feeling of a lump in your throat)
Cough
Diarrhea and Constipation (often alternating like IBS)
Tight neck and shoulders
Headaches, Migraines
Heightened PMS symptoms
Menstrual cramps
Sore breasts
Discomfort in flanks/diaphragm/etc
Bitter taste in mouth
If you just listened to that list and thought, Holy shit, that’s me! I want you to do these three things:
- Keep sighing, do it on purpose.
- Exercise. This is a great way to move Liver Qi - it can be freeflow dance or HIIT. When my liver qi is all built up, I like to do kickboxing classes online - moving through anger that way helps me.
- Stretch your sides. Stand with your feet hip width apart, relax through your knees so that they aren’t locked, raise both arms above your head. Reach over with your left hand and grab your right wrist, allow your side body to open up as you stretch toward the left. Go to 75% and when you’re there, take 3 deep breaths. Come back to center and repeat on the other side. Grab your left wrist with your right hand and allow the left side body to open up, go to 75% of your stretch and then take 3 deep breaths. Do this multiple times a day.
Then, go on and book an appointment with your acupuncturist. For now, I’m still taking new patients in Manhattan and I LOVE treating this you can use this link to book: https://caitdonovanacupuncture.com
If you're not in Manhattan but you know you need my help, like, yesterday - you can book a Breakthrough Burnout Free Consult here: bit.ly/callcait
XOXO
C
If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait
There's a reason that Sarah Dawn is my first repeat guest on FRIED. You can hear her original episode with her burnout story here: https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/post/sarah-dawn
But before you do that, tune into this week's episode to hear:
- The Entrepreneurial Condition [6:41]
- Finding Energy Leakes [11:09]
- This is how it’s always been done syndrome / free coaching from Sarah [13:18]
- Reframing Waste [15:42]
- Examples of deciding to let things go [22:07]
- Exercising Your Emotional Intelligence Muscle [32:10]
- Every Entrepreneur’s Deep Dark Secret [34:24]
- Who to hire as your first team member [37:00]
- Where to leave the personal touch in your business [44:10]
Find Sarah:
Instagram: https://instagram.com/sarahdawnbiz
Sarah’s Website: https://www.sarahdawnconsulting.com/
Resources Mentioned in the Show:
The Resentment Journal Mini Course:
My fave CBD is Incann and as a FRIED listener, you get 20% off!* Check out their Bio Soothe CBD Salve - it’s my fave for sore muscles and neck tension!
*Use the code FRIED for 20% off! When you do that, I get a small percentage of the sale. All proceeds are used to keep FRIED up and running!
Today, I’m recording last minute - which I never do. I am usually recorded a week or even a month in advance, but the combination of having taken time off over the holidays and the shit show at the white house this week means that I’m taking a beat to stop and be with you here, now and to let you know that if productivity is not your focus right now - that’s okay.
It might sound contrite to suggest self care above all else when the world has gone mad, but self care is a rebellious, and political act. You cannot aim to fix injustices that you see if you haven’t slept, had good nutrition, or taken a mental health day. This is especially true for everyone who is battling the ‘isms’. Racism, sexism, ageism, homophobism - when the world is not a safe place for you, your body and nervous system REQUIRE that you take time to restore in a place of your own creation that feels as safe as possible.
This is necessary so that when it is time to face the world again, to fight, to break down barriers, to be yourself in a world that asks you not to be, you have the energy for it. Self-care, in and of itself, is an act of political power. This week, I posted a meme on my socials that said, “Everytime a woman prioritizes herself, the patriarchy crumbles a little” and I meant it, but it should have read: “Everytime anyone who has ever been marginalized prioritizes themselves, the patriarchy crumbles a little.”
The basics of this come down to: First, Rest. Second, Rebel.
First, REST.
Second, Rebel.
But FIRST - first, REST. Restore. Treat yourself like the prize you are. Rejuvenate. Recollect your power. Engage your anger in a way that makes it useful. But first, REST. Scream. FEEL.
Second, Rebel.
This first step requires you to have some knowledge about how to regulate your nervous system. Don’t worry, I’ve got you - I know that they don’t teach this at school. Regulation of the nervous system starts with a feeling of safety and creating that feeling is an individual process. Do you need to grab a soft blanket? Make sure your doors are locked? Clean the kitchen? Organize paperwork? What is it that needs to be in place for you to feel safe?
Right now, I’m home alone for a couple of weeks and I’m in a home that we just bought - we have lived here for less than 2 months - so it isn’t my safe place yet. In order to regulate my nervous system, I need to make sure all my doors are locked - not because I don’t trust my neighbors but because I don’t want to have to think about the door that used to be in a hallway with other apartments and now points straight out onto the street. There is a layer of ‘protection’ that I’ve had my entire adult life that is now gone, so I have to secure the next layer to feel safe.
For me, next is making sure all the basics are clean. I don’t feel as safe when my bed isn’t made and there are dirty dishes on the countertops (and if I’m honest, on the coffee table). I need to put it all away, wipe down the counters, and make my bed. After that, I need to be clean. In order to feel like I’m taking care of myself and am safe, I need to be freshly showered. It makes me feel ready for rest AND ready for action. There’s a preparation ritual that goes with washing yourself that is important to me (it might not be to you - and that’s okay - I’m simply giving examples so that you can try to figure out what helps you feel safe).
After you feel as safe as possible, one of the best ways to regulate your nervous system is to do a short meditation called yoga nidra, or body scan. Don’t worry, it doesn’t take long and you don’t have to sit in lotus position. This particular meditation is also known as sleeping yoga. You can do it on your bed, on your yoga mat, on your couch, anywhere you can lay down comfortably and feel safe.
You may have experienced this before if you’ve taken a yoga class in a studio (I know, don’t remind you that you used to be able to go to a yoga studio…). You know, at the end, when you’re in savasana, also known as corpse pose, and the teacher tells you to relax the skin of your scalp, your eyes, your jaw, and moves down your body - and it feels like the best thing in the whole world?
Yes, that. That is one of the best ways to regulate your nervous system. So this week, I’m releasing two episodes. This one, to let you know that there is a tool that you can implement and one right after that, giving you the tool - with no introduction or interruption so that you can listen to it again and again without having to relisten to or skip the introduction by fast forwarding. I want you to be able to access this ASAP whenever you want it.
So, step one: make your surroundings feel safe. Step two, listen to the next episode of FRIED and give your nervous system what it needs. All the changes last year have not been integrated yet into our bodies and we’re still sort of waiting for normal to come back. It’s not likely to come back as it was before and in order to move forward, our nervous systems need to have the ability to be flexible, agile, and ready. It’s a practice, a lifelong one, but if the last year taught us anything it is that we never know what’s about to happen and making ourselves more comfortable in the ‘now’ is something we should all be striving for so that when life falls to shit, we can fall to shit for a moment and then recoup and get on with our desires to make change, seek justice, empower ourselves and each other, and be the changes we want to see in the world.
Sending you lots of love.
XO
C
Episode summary: In this episode, guest Shonte Javon Taylor who is a neuroscientist with a mission of empowering 100 million minds shares her story of finding herself in a parking lot, after hitting a pole, hearing her children cry in her backseat and hearing her inner voice say, “You have got to do something different”. By using her understanding of the mind and how it best works, Shonte has dedicated her life to inspiring Leaders and Coaches to tap into this same knowledge to make their lives and businesses better and their students and clients happier.
Show Notes: https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/post/shonte-javon-taylor
Topics discussed in this episode:
- Mountain of Pride Exercise [4:34]
- Crashing, literally [9:05]
- Being in your best mental health for you, and the world [10:39]
- What can we do individually to keep our fear brain safe [15:00]
- The modern brain vs. the ancient brain [20:10]
- The amygdala [26:00]
- For our brains to keep growing [30:45]
- Trauma, hypersensitive brains, and chronic stress [37:30]
- Brain Janitors [46:20]
Resources mentioned in this episode:
Shonte’s Optimind Institute 8 Week Course
If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait
My fave CBD is Incan and as a FRIED listener, you get 20% off!* Check out their Bio Soothe CBD Salve - it’s my fave for sore muscles and neck tension!
*Use the code FRIED for 20% off!
(When you do that, I get a small percentage of the sale. All proceeds are used to keep FRIED up and running!)
Fried fans, It’s the end of a hard year. Differently hard for different people, but hard all around. Hard because of uncertainty, hard because of constant change, hard because our brains which are accustomed to functioning on so much repetition and habit really got put through the ringer this year trying to keep up with all the change.
And yet, here we are, at the end of 2020, with a vaccine on the horizon and talk that by the summer we’ll back able to function as we used to.
And so we’ve started to question: Do we want to function like we used to?
Burnout’s name flashed on all the stages this year as so many people were awakened to the fact that this year may have put them over the edge, but they had been burnt out for months, maybe years already.
We miss restaurants and going to stores without fear. We miss meeting our friends and gathering with our loved ones. But, we’re also grateful that 2020 gave us an excuse to hold boundaries, a reason to not meet up, an escape route from the girl’s nights that had gotten dull and the family gatherings that don’t fill you up like you feel they should. You didn’t have to go to that wedding you weren’t looking forward to and you didn’t have to participate in obligatory holiday parties and team building adventures.
So, the question comes up: do we want to function like we used to? Is there a way that we can shift our lives so that we are no longer contributing to burnout culture? Or, as a listener and former client put it, “Can you record something about how we all can help combat burnout culture?”
Yes, yes I can.
The fact that this question was asked was great from my perspective because it means that the burnout healing is well on it’s way - we cannot think about burnout culture on a large scale when we’re overwhelmed with burnout in our own lives, so my first reaction was to be happy that the question was even asked.
Then, I started to think about the answer. And here’s where you get to see into how my mind works.
The first answer that came up is: don’t let another day go by without getting help for your own burnout. You are automatically contributing to burnout culture if you’re burnt out and not doing anything about it. That isn’t to make you feel bad, it’s literally not possible for you to focus on burnout culture if you’re burnt out. We’re talking facts here people - the first care is SELF CARE. If you’ve been around FRIED for awhile, you know that you can reach out to me for coaching, and you know that you can reach out to one of the many guests that have been on to share their stories who now do this work. Physicians can talk to Errin Weisman or Dr. Kara Pepper. Business owners can chat with Leah Steele, Tavona Denise, Sarah Dawn, Erin Elizabeth Wells or Kim Porter. The highly anxious and sensitive can contact Stacey Mitchell, Dr Valerie Rein or Cyrina Talbott.
And that’s not even close to a full list. The resources are there. Choose a method. Contact someone. Get the ball rolling.
The second answer that was reaching up from my guts was: Keep your boundaries clear, kind, and concise. Boundaries are so damn important and when you keep your own, you’re also helping the people around you keep theirs. Modeling good boundaries is a MAJOR key in ending burnout culture. When we’re on a rhythm of allowing our boundaries to be crossed, we end up expecting other people to do the same and then we end up resentful that we’re going the extra mile and they aren’t. We need to flip the script on this. Let other people’s boundaries inspire you to hold your own and when you’re asking someone to break their boundaries - look at the chain - did you break yours first, did the person before you break their own? Are we just continuing a never ending string of boundary breaking and resentment? Hold the line sister, someone’s got to close that gate.
Everyone should be learning better boundaries, everyone. And if you find yourself unable to create boundaries without sounding like an asshole (it happens to the best of us) keep your ears peeled for the next installment of the Build Better Boundaries Course that will happen in the first quarter of 2021.
Lastly, if you want to contribute to #endingburnoutculture - have more fun. Look at your day - add fun. Look at your week - add more fun. Look at your month - where’s the fun? Add more. Life isn’t always happy and fun, and I’ll never pretend that it is - but if we don’t ADD FUN on purpose, we’re missing out on one of the best combatters of burnout there is - JOY.
To sum up, if you want to help end burnout culture:
- Start with your own healing. End the burnout cycle in your life.
- Maintain and model positive boundary behavior
- Add Fun
Fried Fans, we’re starting 2021 off big with a conversation with Shonte Javon Taylor, a neuroscientist on a mission to help us all understand how to use our brains to benefit us in our coaching, leadership, and daily lives.
See you in 2021, be good to yourselves and have more fun.
XOXO
C
Episode summary: In this episode, guest Raj Subrameyer who is an international keynote speaker and tech career coach shares his story fighting against people’s expectations and feeling less than other people and developing a fear of being ignored. So, he turned to people pleasing, hard work, and the promise to himself to do whatever it takes to establish credibility, get fame, money and to get people to notice him in his career.
Topics discussed in this episode:
- Unconscious on the bathroom floor [7:24]
- Burnout Diagnosis, severe dehydration and exhaustion [9:16]
- Anxiety and Panic attacks [14:04]
- Comparison anxiety [18:00]
- The book Deep Work by Cal Newport [24:00]
- Meditation, what it did in Raj’s life, and how you can use it [45:15]
Resources mentioned in this episode:
The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg
Raj’s New Book: Skyrocket Your Career
If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait
Been interested in CBD and want to gift yourself something for the holidays? As a FRIED listener, you get 20% off with Incann - a premier CBD company who works with family organic farms and third party lab testing. Check out their Bio Soothe CBD Salve - it’s my fave for sore muscles and neck tension!
Hey Fried Fans! On this week's #straightfromcait episode, we're going to be going deeper into codependency because so many of you requested it after last week's episode with Melanie Moberg!
I decided to read you part of Chapter 19 of The Bouncebackability Factor because it is in that chapter that I talk about the issue of codependency (without using that word :)) The crux of this week's episode is one of my favorite things to talk about (and one of the most requested workshops for my #speakerlife :)) THE KNOT.
The knot is a theory that helps you come back to yourself, to stay aligned with your destiny, to be sure that you're serving this world the way you are meant to. I hope you'll enjoy this episode as much as I enjoyed reading it for you
Show notes are here: https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/post/sfc-the-knot
P.S. Happy Holidays! The Bouncebackability Factor makes a great gift for all the women in your life - snag a copy ASAP to get it in time (it's print on demand so it takes a minute! :))
**Trigger warning: We discuss suicide and drug use in this episode. If you are particularly sensitive to these topics, you might want to avoid this one.
In this episode, guest Melanie Moberg who is a codependency coach, shares her story through healing codependency that hit her hard after losing her brother. Convinced she could save others, she dove into pouring all her attention into other family members that struggled with mental health and addiction. We chat about how codependent behaviors can steal your ability to know your own wants, needs, desires, and preferences and lead to resentment, fatigue, and yes.. burnout.
Topics discussed in this episode:
- A magic question from a therapist that lead to personal peace [9:00]
- A definition of codependency [11:32]
- An example of codependency in Cait’s life [13:00]
- Boundaries and codependency [19:35]
- Moving out of victimhood [25:13]
- Sick of doing the laundry [33:00]
- The magic question to decipher between enabling and helping [42:26]
“Codependency is caring for others and people pleasing until you’ve lost yourself” Melanie Moberg
Resources mentioned in this episode:
- Melanie’s Blog: https://www.melaniemoberg.com/post/it-s-not-what-you-think
Find Melanie Online: https://www.melaniemoberg.com/
Take Melanie’s Codependency Quiz: https://www.melaniemoberg.com/quiz
Buy Melanie’s Book: Warriors in Recovery on Amazon starting Dec 8th!
If you know that it’s time to actually DO something about the burnout cycle you’ve been in for too long - book your free consult today: bit.ly/callcait
This week on FRIED, we’re covering a topic that I’ve been waiting to cover for a few months now! I was so lucky that a mutual friend introduced me to Sarah Paris, founder of Incann CBD products.
Sarah Paris is a Mom entrepreneur. Like many, working hard, stressed out, and on a quest to feel better, she discovered CBD and the positive impact it had on her mental and physical wellbeing. Inspired by its benefits, she launched Incann, a consumer packaged goods (CPG) brand with the mission to help other women find balance in their lives through a positive outlook, willful mindset and the power of legal cannabis extracts. Motivated by the will to chill, she has formulated products to manage every day stressors and overcome burnout.
Sarah burnt out and reached out for the first time in her life to a holistic practitioner. She was surprised and then inspired by a single question this practitioner asked, “What do you do for yourself?”
It lead Sarah on a journey of self-discovery, personal growth, and inspired business that lead her to starting Incann. So while, during this episode, we’re talking all CBD, I want this to be a reminder to you that sometimes working with the right person can literally change your life.
When Sarah starting experimenting with CBD for herself, she noticed that when she took it, she was less overwhelmed, less anxious, and more focused. After a few months, she started making products for her friends and family to try and now she is the founder and owner of a company that she is so proud of.
The reason it took me so long to get someone on the podcast to talk CBD was because I was having a hard time trusting people that were company owners that obviously wanted to come on to sell product and when I checked their websites, they were missing a piece that I think is CRUCIAL when it comes to choosing products.
Transparency.
When Sarah was recommended to me through a mutual friend, I noticed right away that her website includes not only information that they DO third party lab testing on their products but they give you the opportunity to LOOK directly at the results of those tests and they match it to a batch number that you can find on your bottle. That means that you can buy a bottle and then head online and check out if it’s potency checks out, how clean it is, how pure and free to toxins it is, and so on.
This is completely unregulated so companies do not need to do this. People can sell you a ‘CBD’ product that literally has NO cbd in it. The transparency of Incann makes me trust them as a company and I’m glad to have a place to buy CBD that I feel confident in!
You can check out their products and get 20% off with the code FRIED here.*
Moving into the holiday season, this not only makes a great stocking stuffer (I especially love the bio soothe salve. As big exercisers, my husband and I have been using this stuff like mad. It works wonders!).
XOXO
Cait
Connect with Cait
Book a Call: https://www.caitdonovan.as.me/freecall
Website: www.caitdonovan.com
Instagram: www.instagram.com/friedtheburnoutpodcast
Order My Book: https://bit.ly/bouncebackorder
Connect with Sarah
Website: https://incann.com/
Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/incann_usa
P.S. *I wasn’t planning on it, but after I tried Sarah’s Incann products, I became an affiliate for them. What does that mean? It means that YOU, as my listener, get 20% off all their products and when you buy with the discount code FRIED, I get a percentage of the sale. It helps FRIED keep going, the products will help you keep going, you get a good deal, and you’ll be helping a small business owner keep going too. It’s a WIN WIN WIN WIN! A quadruple win!
P.P.S. Do something to care for yourself this week and book a FREE call with me! Initial calls last 35 minutes and are a great way to kickstart your burnout recovery. Book your call at caitdonovan.as.me/free.
Hi Fried Fans!
It’s Cait, comin’ atcha with another #straightfromcait episode! We are close to winding up Season 2 of FRIED The Burnout Podcast. You’ve got this week’s sfc and then next week, I have the owner of incann CBD products on to talk to us about CBD and burnout (I loved it so much that I became an affiliate for her brand.. So while the episode isn’t sponsored, I’ll be sharing about why I love their products :)) and then I will be starting Season 3 after a short 1 week break around Thanksgiving. We’re starting Season 3 off with a bang and having a chat with a codependency coach. This is a massive topic and I’ll be excited for you to get that info to help you unwind some unhelpful patterns you might find yourself in.
This week, I want to talk to you about burnout myths. There’s a lot of them, but we’re just going to go over 3 big ones. You MAY have heard me mention this a time or 5 on the podcast, but I think they need to be repeated as often as possible and as clearly as possible so that we can collectively change our mind about these ideas. Doing so means that we’ll be more apt to notice burnout and therefore more apt to take it seriously and choose to heal from it.
Let’s jump in
Burnout myth #1
If you work in something that you have a passion for, you’ll never burn out. Or, if you do what you love, you’ll never work a day in your life. I AM BEGGING YOU. PLEASE STOP THIS NONSENSE. If you have tendencies that lead to burnout and are in culture that promotes burnout, you can burnout no matter how much you love your job or no matter how much you really DO want to make a difference in people’s lives.
Burnout is not a result of a passion deficiency.
The problems with this thinking are that it prevents people that are passionate about their jobs from recognizing their burnouts and it makes everyone who knows they are burnt out question their passions.
Your passion isn’t the problem. It’s also not the solution.
Burnout myth #2
Burnout only happens to weak people. Oh boy, I hate this one. There are, for reasons that scientists can’t figure out, people that are more resilient than others. They also can’t agree on a how much adversity or stress increases resiliency and how much breaks it down - because it’s different in each person. Everyone has a threshold for how much they can take and that threshold has nothing to do with your strength. In fact, the strongest among us often carry more than our allotted load, therefore diminishing our resilience and leading us to burnout.
Being resilient and increasing resiliency doesn’t make you STRONGER. It makes you more adaptable, more agile, more flexible. Your threshold is a due to a combination of your genetics, your current health, your current environment, the health of your childhood environment, the number of trauma adaptations you have, the amount of support you have, and and and and and. There are so many factors in play. It’s not about weakness, it’s about systems that get overloaded due to factors that are very often outside of the systems control.
Burnout myth #3
You can get through it if you just keep pushing. In a world that tells us we should never quit, never give up, just keep on keeping on - this one is a hard one to swallow. Burnout will only heal if you allow a certain amount of PAUSE into your life. I’m not saying you have to pause everything, but there are some things that will have to go on hold in order for you to be able to heal. You’ll have to drop some proverbial balls and be okay with pulling away from living life at 200% all the time. Once your threshold has been crossed, you cannot reestablish it by continuing on as if nothing happened. You’ve got to retreat, at least a bit, so that your resilience can be re-established.
This is especially important when we’re talking about a full burnout recovery. When you’re burnt out and your brain has shrunk, the only way for it to regrow is to convince the nervous system to convince the brain that it is no longer under attack and can rest and regenerate. In order to do that, we’ve got to eliminate some of the stressors on the nervous system. Figuring out which stressors to move away from is why you do things like hire a coach, hint, hint.
What other burnout myths have you heard? What other beliefs do you have about burnout that make it more difficult for you to heal? Send ‘em to cait @ caitdonovan.com so that I can make an episode and walk you through them!
In the meantime, we’re heading into the holiday season so I want to remind everyone that you deserve space and kindness and boundaries. If you’ve been struggling all year, it is time to get off the struggle bus. Book a call with me, let’s start busting through this burnout cycle that’s got you feeling like you’re stuck in the eye of a storm.
2020 left a lot of things out of our control, 2021 is for building resilience.
You can book your call at bit.ly/callcait.
CBD: https://incann.com/ CODE: FRIED
In today’s episode, we’re talking to Simone Craig, Wealth Expert on a mission to close the wealth gap one woman at a time. Known as the “Angel CFO”, Simone advises women business owners in making wise financial decisions for maximized business profitability, increased personal wealth and joyful living.
She has 25+ years experience in the financial industry, including the Big 4 company, KPMG Peat Marwick, as well as the private sector.
Simone is a Law of Attraction and manifestation expert. She loves advising her clients how to have the mindset and money management skills to create a thriving business and live a wealthy joyful life.
Simone and I met at a networking event in Morristown, NJ through the group Ellevate. She was sitting at a high top table on the far wall, dressed to the 9’s and my favorite thing that I noticed about her was that you could tell immediately that she was an observer of people. We had a good chat that night and then connected on all the social medias - as one does.
If you’ve been listening to FRIED for awhile you know that I have some bones to pick with the Law of Attraction and Manifestation, so when I first saw some of Simone’s posts, I was like - oh no, another one. But then, as time passed, she surprised me more and more. Her money advice is practical, grounded, AND spiritual - which is my most favorite of all the combos.
Why is money important when it comes to burnout? It’s really common when you’re on the burnout cycle to also be on a feast or famine cycle and not do a great job of managing your money. Burnout types often have all or nothing attitudes, so we’ll save for ages and then use it all on a big purchase and have to start from scratch. We spend our money like we spend our energy - without attention and without proper boundaries. It’s either built up and stagnant or empty and needing replenishment.
In this episode, we talk about the journey of the middle road, consciously choosing balance, awareness, upleveling instead of a life that sits in the extremes. Simone talks about having a moment where she started to reflect more on the future after turning 30 and asking: “How do I make things happen for myself instead of leaving everything on default?”
At that point, she found Abraham Hicks, The Secret, The Law of Attraction and she decided to ask if it was all BS or if deliberate creation actually worked. She took responsibility for herself and her finances and gave herself a goal of getting out of her parents house in 12 months. It worked.
We chatted about using these techniques when you’re burnt out and why it doesn’t always work and what needs to happen before you can take advantage of these tools.
You’ll get all that information and more in this week’s episode of FRIED.
Can’t wait to hear what hit you the most and what you’ll take with you moving forward!
XOXO
Cait
Connect with Cait
Book a Call: https://www.caitdonovan.as.me/freecall
Website: www.caitdonovan.com
Instagram: www.instagram.com/friedtheburnoutpodcast
Order My Book: https://bit.ly/bouncebackorder
Connect with Simone
Website: http://www.simonecraig.com
Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/simonelebeauxcraig
LinkedIN: http://www.linkedin.com/in/simonecraig
It's BOUNDARY SEASON!
Yep, that's right. The season that all your boundaries get pushed and 2020 has already pushed them enough, so they might be feeling like electric fences this year! ;)
I wrote you a song all to tell you that we start transforming you into a Boundary Building Badass in just 12 short days.
Sign ups are open now for The Build Better Boundaries course, it WAS a DIY course but on popular demand, I'm doing a LIVE version with a FB Group and Live Q&A's with yours truly to help you along.
After the year we've all had, it's the least I could do.
Sign ups are here:
https://caitdonovan.com/build-better-boundaries-live
Join us. It's gonna be a blast. Like this song.
:)
<3
Hey Fried Fans,
This week’s #straightfromcait episode is the answer to a fan question (I love those, so if you have one that YOU want answered, shoot me an email at cait@caitdonovan.com with the subject: FAN QUESTION and I’ll get to it, it usually takes me about a month to get the episode out and it’s so much fun for me to give you exactly what you need.
Here’s the Q:
So, the holidays are coming up and if you’re the boss of a department it’s kinda expected that everyone else can take vacation time around the holidays but not you, because someone has to be on deck. So this means, year after year, you work the week of Thanksgiving and the week of Xmas. How do you juggle the expectation that if you’re the boss, your needs come second to your subordinate without getting burnt?
OK, my friend. Let’s break this down a little. First, we need to look at the assumptions in this Q. You state: it’s ‘kinda expected’ that everyone else can take vacation time around the holidays but not you.
Is this 100% true or is this a story that you told yourself because you took the responsibility on because YOU learned at some point in your life that this is how you think it ‘should’ be (if you missed the episode on shoulding, head back a few weeks and listen in, it’s a good one).
You start juggling this expectation by checking yourself.
Use these Q’s:
Where did this expectation come from?
Why do you believe it?
What actions have you taken as the boss in previous years that may lead you to believe this is true?
What actions have you taken as the boss in previous years that may lead your team to believe that this is true?
The basic facts of the matter are this: your needs DON’T come second to your team’s needs. But now, you’re going to have to change the rules of the game on them and you’ll have to expect some blowback.
Here’s how it goes:
First, you need to decide on a new system. Are you going to rotate the holidays within your team, so one person takes thanksgiving and the other xmas? Is one person going to get the whole year of holidays and then the next 2 or 3 years off (depending on the size of your team) or is there a better solution that you see? I can’t tell you what all the options are without knowing more specifics about the business and the team, but suffice it to say, there’s a better system than leaving all the responsibility eggs in the leaders basket.
Second, you need to decide how to present the new system - WITHOUT EMOTION and WITHOUT MENTIONING that you’ve done it in the past for years and years and now you need a break. YOU’RE THE BOSS - you make the rules. Turning yourself into a victim for working the past years will make whoever gets this year’s holidays feel like THEY are the victim.
So, it might sound something like this:
Hi Everyone, The holidays are coming up and the system for who works the holidays is changing this year. We are going to start rotating who works the week of Thanksgiving and Xmas so that everyone has the opportunity to take real time off during the holidays. This Thanksgiving will be (team member a) and Xmas will be (team member b). If you need to switch with each other, that’s no problem - just be sure that the communication is clear and the person who will be responsible for those days is available. If you’re going to make any changes amongst each other, please let me know by the end of next week. Thank you! :)
Third, you actually have to have this conversation. Open your zoom room and get chatting. Remember to be as neutral as possible, this is NOT an emotional conversation and it will work better if it’s presented that way. Prepare yourself for discord and blowback. Changing the rules in the middle of the game will be met with some grunting and disapproval. That’s okay. Brene Brown and Oprah remind us that we cannot live brave lives without disappointing some people.
They will survive. And you’ll get that break that you need and deserve.
I hope that was helpful!
Lately, there have been a lot of questions about boundaries, balancing being vs. doing, handling energy preservation, and energy replenishing in your day to day lives. I do have an online course on this called Build Better Boundaries but what I’ve been hearing from you is that you want a live version of this course so that we can dig a little deeper and that you can have support along the way.
I’m listening and we’re starting Nov 15th. The class is 8 weeks long, and we’ll break for Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Years - so our finish date will be late January. I think this is the PERFECT time to work on boundaries because we’re in, as I like to call it, BOUNDARY SEASON! Doing this class now ensures that you start next year with some bonus energy, some skills for replenishing your own energy sans caffeine, and everything you need to create killer boundaries.
The link to join is here: https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/post/sfc-boss-needs
- I can’t wait to have this experience with you.
XOXO
C
In today’s episode, we’re talking to Isabel Smith, a Registered Dietician who specializes in helping clients with functional and integrative wellness. One of her main areas of interest in her practice is healing allergies and histamine reactions. This arose out of her own need to use her skills to heal herself after years of living in an apartment with black mold. Isabel is well known and respected in her field and sits on the advisory board for MBODY 360 and Eat This, Not That. Her expert opinions can be found in Elle, Mind Body Green, Reader's Digest, Women’s Health/Men’s Health and now, thankfully, on FRIED. The Burnout Podcast.
I’ve known Isabel personally for over a year and I know how seriously she takes her craft. I call it a craft because I don’t know anyone who works with diet and supplements the way Isabel does. She is unafraid of complicated cases and her results, time after time, are astounding. In this episode, she shares snippets from her own life, and her process of working through health issues related to allergies and histamines.
Why is this important when it comes to burnout? Because I’ve found over the years that oftentimes, there are invisible chronic health issues that accompany burnout and are partially responsible for your ability (or inability) to function at the same level of energy as before. This is why I do a full Chinese Medicine health intake with each new coaching client - I need to see what physical components are stealing energy from you. Shifting that often helps to create enough extra energy to deal with the rest.
Allergies and histamine reactions accompanied by inflammation are commonly found in burnout and both Isabel and I are passionate about getting you the info you need to shift this part of your life.
In this episode, we chat about histamine reactions and symptoms (waking up with puffy eyes, having itchy skin, having reactions to food that didn’t used to bother you, fatigue, foggy headedness, and so many more). Isabel explains (using MINIONS!) how to keep our cells health and shares with us her latest online course, The Histamine Solution Program, that helps guide you through the histamine diet that is perfect for you and gives you the support of a group at the same time.
You’ll get all that information and more in this week’s episode of FRIED.
Can’t wait for a few of you to have lightbulb moments that lead to great healings!
XOXO
Cait
Connect with Cait
Book a Call: https://www.caitdonovan.as.me/freecall
Website: www.caitdonovan.com
Instagram: www.instagram.com/friedtheburnoutpodcast
Pre-Order My Book: https://bit.ly/bouncebackorder
Connect with Isabel
Website: http://www.isabelsmithnutrition.com
Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/isabelsmithnutrition
HISTAMINE SOLUTION: https://www.isabelsmithnutrition.com/health/programs/the-histamine-solution-program
P.S. Do something to care for yourself this week and book a FREE call with me! Initial calls last 35 minutes and are a great way to kickstart your burnout recovery. Book your call at caitdonovan.as.me/free.
“Stop should-ing all over yourself” also known as “must-urbation”, why you need to pay attention to the word SHOULD during your burnout recovery.
I was laying on the table at my acupuncturists office and I said the thing that I just reprimanded a patient for the night before. “But, my body SHOULD be able to do this!”
And as soon as it came out of my mouth, I realized it and my shoulders dropped.
Recovering from my ruptured achilles tendon and subsequent surgery over the past year and a half has been much slower and more cumbersome than I would have liked it to be. In the meantime, I’ve put on weight and I’ve started “should-ing” all over myself.
I should eat better.
I should be able to exercise more.
I should create better habits.
I should I should I should.
Here’s the thing: accepting the limitations that my body currently has and trying to improve in small increments works better than forcing myself past what I’m capable of and then needing extra time to recover.
The same goes for you during your burnout recovery. It doesn’t matter if you USED to be able to do something. It doesn’t matter if you’re annoyed that you’re unable right now. It doesn’t matter if you think your body SHOULD be able to do something.
Your job during burnout recovery is to use your current limitations to create your current boundaries. They will shift and widen as you heal, I promise, but when you’re starting out - you need more space, more cushion, more blank time in your schedule, more gentle movement, and more grace for your process.
Most of us that burnout stay stuck on the burnout cycle because of the Should-ing. Because we are comparing our current abilities to what we used to be able to do. Guess what? You’re burnt out. Your current abilities are less than what you’re used to and if you don’t learn how to adjust, you’ll just stay on this cycle for years and years and years. Trust me, that’s exactly what I did.
Burnout is invisible to the naked eye. There are plenty of things changing in your body and in your brain, but because you can’t see it, you don’t adjust. You just keep pushing, believing that you can because you used to be able to.
But let’s think about it a minute. When you’re burnt out, lets say that you have 40% of your normal energy. Why on EARTH should you be able to do as much as before on 60% less energy? If your gas tank was only 40% full, would you be able to drive the same number of miles as you could on a full tank?
You know how the battery on your phone empties throughout the day, little by little? I wish we had one like that for our bodies so that there was a physical, visible representation of how long we could keep going before needing to be recharged.
When you’re burnt out, you’re not starting the day on a full battery. If you’re burnt out and also recovering from an injury or an illness, or better, have a chronic illness, you have even less juice to start with. So here’s this week’s #straightfromcait actionable tip:
Pay attention to your limits and listen to them. Stop should-ing all over yourself.
Work within what you’ve got and you’ll start to recover.
Promise.
If you’re not sure where your boundaries are, start taking note of all the times you tell yourself during the day that you should or must do something and then start eliminating/delegating all those jobs :)
This concept and so many more uber practical tips are what make up the 200 pages of The Bouncebackability Factor, which, if you haven’t bought yet - I seriously don’t know what you’re waiting for!
Also, if you don’t think that you can possibly eliminate or delegate and you’re stuck thinking that change is impossible, please know that you’re wrong. LOL.
My job is to prove this to people every single day. I’m taking 8 more clients until the end of 2020 and starting the new year with a price increase, so if you want to get in at the current rate, you should book your free call before the holidays! bit.ly/callcait
Talk to you soon!
Cait
FIND CAIT ONLINE: https://caitdonovan.com
BOOK YOUR FREE CONSULT: bit.ly/callcait
BOOK ACUPUNCTURE IN NYC: https://caitdonovanacupuncture.com
SEE ALL FRIED EPISODES: https://friedtheburnoutpodcast.com
In today’s episode, we’re talking to Sarah O’Brien Hammond. Sarah is the Chief Community Officer and Founder of The Network of Women. Driven by her own life’s journey, her mission is to bring together growth-minded women through diverse and unique experiences focused on helping them live their best, most fulfilled life in a supportive, judgement free safe space. I’ve been attending NoW events since I moved to the US and Sarah has proven to be an amazing connector of people and friend.
During our conversation, Sarah shares how she checked all the boxes, did all the things that society told her to do along the way, added a few Ironmans for a good time, and still woke up one day thinking:
Is this it?!?!?
Sarah continued, “I hit a wall. It happened to me at 41. I was like oh my gosh, I’m exhausted, and I’m not happy, and I’m not fulfilled, and I’ve been working my ass off for all these years and this is where I’m at?”
How many of us has stopped and asked ourselves, “Is this IT!?”
I know I did. I played by all the rules, I even added some heart following along the way and made some bold decisions and still reached a point where I was like… “Is this what I now have to do as an adult for the next 50 or so years? WTF for? What is the point? This sucks!”
As our convo continued, we got into Sarah’s zone of genius which is networking and connecting and she gave us 3 amazing tips for avoiding networking burnout.
- Be realistic about what you can commit to. Know your bandwidth. Know your boundaries. Be sure you’re not signing up for everything available just because you feel like you should. If you can commit to one hour a month, use it well.
- Be Intentional with choosing your events. Choose them for yourself and not just growing your business. Prep for them and be present when you’re there.
- Know your ask. What are you looking to get out of the event? Who can you help? Are you looking for clients or maybe a referral source? Being clear on what you’re striving for makes it easier to get and makes your introductions more clear!
I love talking to Sarah and it was great to have her on FRIED because I got to sneak an extra hour of chatting with her which is always fun for me. The thing that hit me most in this episode was that you can literally have it all and still burn out.
What is one thing that stuck out for you from this conversation? What’s your biggest takeaway?
Both Sarah and I would love to know, so please share and tag us on social media so we can support and cheer for you!
Connect with Cait
Website: www.caitdonovan.com
Instagram: www.instagram.com/friedtheburnoutpodcast
Pre-Order My Book: https://bit.ly/bouncebackorder
Connect with Sarah
Website: https://www.thenownyc.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thenownyc/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/thenownyc/
LinkedIN: https://linkedin.com/in/sarahobrienhammond
USE CODE: NOWGUEST for free access to an event at The NoW!
Xo
Cait
P.S. Do something to care for yourself this week and book a FREE Breakthrough Burnout Call with me! Initial calls last 35 minutes and are a great way to kickstart your burnout recovery. Book your call at caitdonovan.as.me/free.
Hi Fried Fans,
We’re taking it real serious today and I’m starting with a TRIGGER WARNING! - we will be discussing suicidal ideations today.
If you are sensitive to this topic, I suggest skipping this episode. If you are having suicidal ideations, I highly recommend that you reach out to the suicidepreventionhotline.org - this is applicable no matter where you are in the world.
And after I wrote that intro piece, I avoided writing the next part. I checked facebook, replied to an email from a coaching client, scrolled through Instagram because even though I know we NEED to talk about this, it’s a little bit big and scary.
If you’ve been listening to FRIED for awhile, you already know that there aren’t many conversations that I shy away from. I am big fan of leaning into difficult conversations - it’s part of what makes me a good coach and part of what gets the good juice out of interviewees.
The conversation gets even more interesting if you’ve already read The Bouncebackability Factor because I write about suicidal ideations in the book - so the information is out there and the feedback I’m getting from it tells me that you thought you were alone in these thought patterns, that you were the only one who thought like this, and you’re grateful to know that you’re not.
When my first coaching client mentioned that she had been dreaming of getting into a car accident just to get a break from life, I wasn’t shocked. I was relieved at her honesty. When a podcast guest said she seriously considered veering off the road into a tree - just to break a leg and be able to spend some time in the hospital, I felt the truth of her statement in my gut. When over and over again my highly accomplished successful female entrepreneur clients tell me that they wish they could escape, I know that we’re about to make a breakthrough.
When Dr. Valerie Rein shared so openly on her podcast episode and in her book, Patriarchy Stress Disorder, about landing in the hospital and being relieved that “There were no demands on me. Except to lay there and breathe. I was guilt-free; possibly for the first time as a mother, wife and professional. A stroke scare quailed at me for a hall pass. Surrounded by the soft meditative beeping of the machines, I began to relax and enjoy my spa day in a hospital gown”
My spa day in a hospital gown. That is what burnout is leading us to desire. This is the kind of desperation we are talking about. That moment where you think, “Maybe I’ll just walk into traffic”, or you’re jealous that your friend is sick and in the hospital - even though you won’t ACTUALLY do these things and you don’t REALLY want to be sick, you fantasize about them because they seem like the only way out.
I’m here today to tell you that they aren’t the only way out. I recently wrapped up with a coaching client who said,
“When I found Cait, I was looking for a new everything: job, relationship, self, life. A way out of the life I was living. I knew what I was doing wasn't working, but didn't know what else to do and was ready to scratch it all and start over (whatever that meant!). I had read the books and blogs, gone to therapy, listened to all kinds of "expert" advice, but it didn't stick, and I was still stuck. I was skeptical at first. I have been to traditional therapists for years, and had read all a ton of self-help work, but always hit the same wall and decided the alternative route of a coach might be a better fit. I ended my work with Cait feeling more centered, more in control (but not controlling!) and more confident in my ability to create, modify, and maintain boundaries that serve me.”
Shifting out of this place where change feels impossible without a major disaster (I mean, haven’t we had enough of that already this year?) is possible, and I’m here to help you do it. This month, I’m asking 3 women who need this work to seize the moment and start the change. 2021 is around the corner, and I want you to start it feeling more in control, more like yourself, and less like driving off a road, just for a break.
If this is you, don’t hesitate any longer. This year was shitty enough without bonuses, it’s time to take the reins back. You can book your free consult at bit.ly/callcait.
I can’t wait to create space for your story, your truth, your shift, and your healing.
Talk soon, real soon.
XOXO
Cait
In today’s episode, we’re talking to Darrel Griffin , a Human-centred marketer and anti-guru who, after experiencing his own burnout, is now creating a podcast and a community for men to openly discuss their burnout stories and get the support they need called Burnout Bros.
During our conversation, Darrel shared stories about repeated chest infections, wailing so loud he was afraid the neighbors heard and carrying the burden of being the sole financial provider for a young family with his business network on the other side of the world.
Speaking with Darrel, we touched upon the dangers that patriarchal society holds for both men and women, the importance of finding a doctor that you like and who will listen to you, and the need to sometimes drop the judgment about taking medications for mental health if that’s what you need.
What I’d love to know is: Have you ever taken a pharmaceutical for mental health? Was it helpful? DId you judge yourself for it?
Darrel let us know in this episode that it was a hard decision for him and the first one chosen wasn’t a great fit but that he learned to create acceptance around it. We hope that this episode allows you to give yourself the permission to heal, in whatever form is most appropriate for you right now!
Darrel was really clear that burnout is f’ing awful and that talking about it more openly is crucial to all of us giving ourselves a break and reaching out for the help we need.
If you’re tired, overwhelmed, and wishing you could just escape from it all for awhile, you might want to hop on a free call to see if I can help guide you away from the burnout cycle!
Connect with Cait
Website: www.caitdonovan.com
Instagram: www.instagram.com/friedtheburnoutpodcast
Order My Book: https://bit.ly/bouncebackorder
Connect with Darrel
Website: https://www.darrelgriffin.com.au/
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/darrelgriffin/
Join Darrel’s Newsletter: http://eepurl.com/dE6W3D
Xo
Cait
P.S. Do something to care for yourself this week and book a FREE call with me! Initial calls last 35 minutes and are a great way to kickstart your burnout recovery. Book your call at caitdonovan.as.me/free.
Hi Fried Fans!
Your #straightfromcait episode this week got me a little fired up.
I saw this quote by Simon Sinek floating around IG a few weeks ago and - well, I have a bone to pick with it. Let me preface this by saying I love Simon Sinek. His work is inspirational to me and this is in no way a judgment or criticism on him. I know that there are a few quotes from my book that I don’t stand by when they are written alone - it’s the full context that makes things make the most sense.
In fact, when Annick Ina (the woman who helped me launch my book) had her VA write up some quotes to share from The Bouncebackability Factor for promotions, I nixed one of them because I hated it on it’s own - it’s not the message I want to share. I went back and read the whole chapter and felt good about it, but as a single sentence.. Ick.
So, with that incredible pre-amble, I’m going to read this quote and tell you why I dislike it.
“Working hard for something we don't care about is called stress: Working hard for something we love is called passion." ― Simon Sinek
If I’ve said this once, I’ve said it a million times. YOU CAN STILL BURN OUT IF YOU’RE WORKING AT YOUR PASSION!
Being out of alignment with what you’re meant to be doing in the world is but one small piece of the burnout puzzle. Being in alignment with what you’re meant to be doing and overworking, overgiving, undercharging, and having shitty boundaries will still burn you out - no matter how passionate you are.
There are so many pieces to living a well lived life. There are so many pieces to building a sustainable business and yet there are few hard and fast rules. Most pieces need to be adjusted and upgraded as we go. Systems change, rules change, our energy changes - and we need to learn to respect that.
I have been following my passion my whole damn life. Hell, I left nearly a full academic scholarship at Boston University on a pre-med track to head to California and take out massive loans to study Chinese medicine. I paid back those massive loans in 9 years - but it added to my burnout. Needing to earn that much more money was a burden. The loans were a burden. The patient load was a burden. My need to people please and have people like me was a burden.
I wasn’t on the wrong track. I was learning and growing and burnout is what ended up being my guide. Burnout taught me how to balance passion with energy. Enthusiasm with boundaries. Love for my work with love for my life.
So, Simon - apologies. This wasn’t an attack on you - but I really really don’t like that statement. I don’t need to see more incredibly talented and passionate people burn out because they aren’t respecting their edges.
I want to see more people enjoying their passion AND their lives. I want to see more entrepreneurs building businesses that they love AND are sustainable. I want entrepreneurs to feel less guilty and more proud when they choose days of rest and restoration knowing that it only makes their business better when they feel 100%. I want to see entrepreneurs building lives they love that aren’t their business so they aren’t living it 24/7. Love your business, but enjoy your hobbies, friends, and family too.
If you feel burdened by the constant barrage of info that tells you you should feel great when you follow your passion but you find yourself feeling like your passion is a boulder that is slowly crushing you, book a call - let's fix it.
Let's work together to figure out how we can utilize your passion AND respect your energy at the same time!
Book A FREE Call Here
-------------------------------------------------------------
Need some super affordable help RIGHT NOW?
Here's two options:
1. The Bouncebackability Factor: End Burnout, Gain Resilience, and Change the World - is the first book dedicated to burnout in female entrepreneurs. If you're overwhelmed and not sure where to start your healing process - start here!
2. The Resentment Journal Mini Course - A mini course in transforming resentment, anger, and irritation into energy and clearer boundaries. It's just $27 and it could change your whole life.
And she'd love for you to ask yourself, "What if......
P.P.S. The Bouncebackability Factor: End Burnout, Gain Resilience, and Change the World is OUT! This book is for everyone who has ever felt burnt out with a special flavor in there for the female entrepreneur. Get your copy here
Hi Fried Fans!
On the last #straightfromcait episode, I shared 5 words with you that come up often as guides on my clients’ burnout recovery journeys. Those words were: safety, owning your genius, embodiment, community, and truth.
When it came time to make the infographic for the episode (if you’re not following me on LinkedIn or Instagram, now's the time to get on board! :)), I added one more word - RESTORE.
And when I asked you which of these words resonated most, RESTORE was the winner by a country mile. Some of the comments you left taught me that you still aren’t sure how to turn this word into an actionable step that you can take in your life, so I decided to break it down for you.
First, we have to think about what this word means when it comes to being a human. I mean, we could talk about restoring furniture, but I’m not sure if the metaphor would work. The word restore has a simple definition: to bring something or someone back to a former condition but when we’re talking about health, is that really what we mean?
Here’s what I think resonated with you in the word restore (and feel free to correct me if I’m wrong!)
The word restore means to be brought to a state of overall well being. It might be a state that is even better than a state you have ever experienced. It means creating space for healing. It means slowing down, having a respite from day to day events and stressors, and allowing your body to use it’s natural powers of rejuvenation without interrupting her before she’s done.
It means sleeping deeply, eating well, and resting without feeling guilty.
But that all sounds like a tall order, so how can you start to give your body more time to restore itself today within the schedule that you currently have?
Luckily, I have a few ideas ;)
You'll find 3 tips in this episode and 2 of them take under 60 seconds.
Let me know which is your favorite!
XOXO
C
ALSO - The Bouncebackability Factor (my first book!) is available for pre-order (in the kindle version, the paperback will be out Sept 14th). Check it out here: bit.ly/bouncebackorder
AND - I loooooooooove hearing your stories. If you have been pushed too far to the edge and you're ready to end the burnout cycle and live the life you deserve, book your initial call here: bit.ly/callcait
That first call is free and it's everything we need to figure out if I'm the right person to help you right now.
Slots for the fall are filling up quickly, so snag yours asap! :)
In today’s episode, I’m speaking with Kimberley Taylor, a Mindset Expert and Certified NLP Practitioner who helps successful women entrepreneurs smash through their inner limits and welcome in more income, confidence & impact.
Using her multi-disciplined coaching style, she helps her clients to fully release the baggage that is slowing them down, reimagine what is possible for them and create their own unique success blueprint. By helping women to uncover and release their past limitations and money stories, she enables them to achieve results like selling out their programs on repeat, doubling their rates and selling $10k+ packages with ease, all whilst feeling more powerful, joyful and trusting of themselves.
We talked about how she burnt out at the end of University leading to an overdose, coped with intense pressure (badly)at work leading to building a business that caused burnout instead of freedom and why it’s so crucial to allow the deeper, inner healing to completely release burnout. Kim also shares how she works on the deeper aspects of healing with her clients and where coaches and entrepreneurs can get tempted to “do-it-yourself” and how that cheats you of real transformation, you don’t want to miss that!
I truly enjoyed speaking with Kimberley and sharing my own truths, so in keeping with the theme of vulnerability, both of us would love to know
What resonated the most with you from today’s episode and ONE way you are committed to supporting yourself on your healing journey TODAY?
Send me a message on Instagram and I cannot wait to hear from you!
Connect with Cait
Website: www.caitdonovan.com
Cait on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/cait_donovan
Fried on Instagram: www.instagram.com/friedtheburnoutpodcast
Pre-Order My Book: https://bit.ly/bouncebackorder
Connect with Kimberley
Website: https://www.kimberleytaylor.net/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kimclaretaylor/
Grab your copy of Kim’s Free Guide Here http://bit.ly/ktc-Limiting-Beliefs-Guide
Xo
Cait
P.S. Do something to care for yourself this week and book a FREE call with me! Initial calls last 35 minutes and are a great way to kickstart your burnout recovery. Book your call at caitdonovan.as.me/free.
This episode is being released on my birthday! YAYYAYAYYAYAY!
Shout me out everywhere because I love my Birthday! :)
Especially tag me on IG: @cait_donovan
Today I want to chat with you about the power of words. Often, in the first call with a new coaching client, there is a word that pokes itself out and decides that this is what we need to focus on during our work together.
It happens intuitively, and it serves as great guidance as you heal. Today, I want to share 5 of them with you that happen to pop up fairly frequently!
1. Safety - there can be a lack of safety in your life even if you’re technically ‘safe’. If there are areas where you feel unsafe, your nervous system will remain stuck in fight or flight and it will be really hard for you to heal. This can mean living with someone who has explosive emotions, it can mean feeling that you don’t buy new stuff because you’re afraid you can’t care for it.
2. Owning Your Genius - this is true if you’re on the right path, but still need to allow yourself to grow to a bigger scale - staying small can burn you out!
- Truth - when you are living a life that your parents or culture would deem acceptable but what you want to do is a little less conventional or socially acceptable than traditional modes of working ( or LIVING).
- Community - we need other people. A couple weeks ago, I did a #straightfromcait about external validation and I meant every single word. Soon, there will be a FB group around The Bouncebackability Factor (preorder now!)
- Embodiment - the knowledge that you have in your brain is shared with your heart and your body. I was stuck in intellectualizing my situation for a long time and I HAD the knowledge, but I wasn’t APPLYING all the knowledge. Practicing allows for embodiment!
If you want your own word, we start by getting on a free consult call (we need to know we love each other before we start this process! :)). You can book a time slot for yourself here: bit.ly/callcait
XOXO
Cait
P.S. The Bouncebackability Factor Reviews are IN! Here’s an example to get you excited to snag your copy ASAP…
“I laughed, I cried, I took a deep breath and sighed … was it possible Cait had been following me around and documenting my trials and tribulations??? It was a BLESSING to acknowledge that the symptoms and manifestations of Burn-Out were systemic in society, especially so with women. It was also reaffirming to know that it is possible to slow the progression of being fried alive by learning to recognize signs and symptoms and pay attention to the whispers of the body that require attention and lovingkindness, before the whispers turn into screams, or worse.” Kathy
P.P.S. Want to pre-order your kindle copy IMMEDIATELY!??! You can do that here :)
In today’s episode, I’m speaking with Nicole Liloia, a therapist and business strategist who helps women entrepreneurs build bigger businesses and create consistent income growth by helping them create multiple income streams. Her system allows her clients the freedom to work less, while still making more money. Nicole got her Masters in Social Work from Columbia University, loves Taco Tuesdays and Apothic wine.
Nicole talks about her experience living on a small salary in the Big Apple and how that contributes to burnout, her love for travel and how that inspired her to bust through the limiting ideas of running her own business, affiliate marketing and of course, Dawson’s Creek (that’s why you’re here, isn’t it?)!
We discussed how we can often suffer from burnout but call it laziness and be ruthlessly hard on ourselves and how it actually takes time to recover, it’s not a flip of a switch for anyone.
Stay till the end, because Nicole also shares some easy tips on affiliate marketing and how you can get started today, even if you have a job or don’t have a business. Plus, ways you can start saving on autopilot and guarantee a more secure future for yourself!
I truly enjoyed speaking with Nicole and love that she actually lives so close to me and both of us would love to know what resonated the most with you from today’s episode and would you like to listen to an episode dedicated to finances and burnout? Send me a message on Instagram and I cannot wait to hear from you!
Connect with Cait
Website: www.caitdonovan.com
Cait on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/cait_donovan
Fried on Instagram: www.instagram.com/friedtheburnoutpodcast
Pre-Order My Book: https://bit.ly/bouncebackorder
Connect with Nicole
Website:https://www.nicoleliloia.com
Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/nicoleliloia
Grab your Freebie here https://www.nicoleliloia.com/multiple-income-streams
Xo
Cait
P.S. Do something to care for yourself this week and book a FREE call with me! Initial calls last 35 minutes and are a great way to kickstart your burnout recovery. Book your call at caitdonovan.as.me/free.
In this week's #straightfromcait episode, I want to share with you just how important external validation is. Yes, it matters. No, you shouldn't go on without it.
It is so important that its one of the biggest external burnout risk factors. That's right. Not hearing enough praise or recognition (or worse, hearing only negative feedback) is a MAJOR factor in your ability to stay burnout free.
I know that the world of coaching and the law of attraction would love for you to believe that you create your entire reality and if you just straighten out everything internally, your whole life will fall into place and you'll feel amazing all the time. What other people think about you and say about you will become immaterial....
I'm here to tell you today that that is total BS. We need each other. I need you. We're a community. We don't truly do anything alone (even if it feels like it sometimes). We need to be loved, recognized, and praised.
In my personal burnout story, I needed someone to love me from the outside before I learned how to love myself. It didn't start with me, it started with my best friend, Ewa.
She showed me how to love myself by loving me when I still didn't know how.
Other people matter. Who you surround yourself with matters.
That's the truth.
So, for today - know this:
I LOVE YOU.
YOU ARE MAGICAL.
YOU DESERVE LOADS OF GOODNESS IN YOUR LIFE.
XOXO
C
Dying for me to be your coach?!?!? (me too! ;))
Book a free consult here:
bit.ly/callcait
Can't wait to talk to you and create space for your magic.
In today’s episode, we’re talking to Khadijah Tishan Washington MSW, LCSW , a licensed therapist who credits her own creative and chaotic childhood with inspiring her passion for social work. Khadijah began her journey of service and self- healing in child and family mental health. Her latest book, ‘REAL’ is a memoir of healing and deeper awareness that directs you to serve the most vulnerable- the people serving the neglected, abused, and marginalized. Khadijah describes this journey of serving and self-healing as ‘REAL’.
During our conversation, she shares snippets from her own life, her childhood and her lived experience with racism in America and generational trauma it inflicts, what makes her so passionate and how all of that has informed her work over the years
I truly enjoyed speaking with Khadijah and having this extremely important conversation continue. I’d love to know: What is one thing that stuck out for you from this conversation? What’s your biggest takeaway?
Both Khadijah and I would love to know, so please share and tag us on social media so we can support and cheer for you!
Connect with Cait
Website: www.caitdonovan.com
Instagram: www.instagram.com/friedtheburnoutpodcast
Pre-Order My Book: https://bit.ly/bouncebackorder
Connect with Khadijah
Website: https://khadijahtishan.com/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/khadijahtishan/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/khadijahtishan/
Xo
Cait
P.S. Do something to care for yourself this week and book a FREE call with me! Initial calls last 35 minutes and are a great way to kickstart your burnout recovery. Book your call at caitdonovan.as.me/free.
Hi FRIED Friends!
LINK: bit.ly/callcait
You’ve found yourself right in the beginning of a #straightfromcait episode and I’m so grateful that you’re here.
Your time, and your listening energy is so appreciated and my biggest hope is that the information you get by being here is worth every last second. I really do my best to be sure that’s the truth!
We’re at the end of July now and holy shit, it’s almost August 2020. Can you even? I cannot.
In August, I will celebrate my 38th Birthday (I love my birthday, so get ready to hear about it a few times in the coming episodes ;)) and let me tell you, I’m not where I thought I’d be.
Growing up, I knew I’d do something a little different, I was always a little left of center when it came to my choices, my friends, my style, and my ideas. And even though this was always a part of me, I felt too far away from center for a long time. As a pre-med student who turned to Chinese medicine instead, and as an American living abroad, and then as an author of a book and a podcast on a topic that no one used to talk about - it seems like I’m always at tne edges.
Living on that edge, making the different choice, following my heart sometimes left me defensive and in a state where I had to PROVE to everyone that I wasn’t crazy, that acupuncture worked, that life coaching matters, that the work I do is POWERFUL and transformational even if other people didn’t understand it.
It’ll be no surprise to you, as a FRIED The Burnout Podcast listener, that this constant need to prove my value because I was not in the mainstream was part of my burnout. I realized this past week that is no longer the case. Not only do I not have anything to prove (I’ve already done the uber successful bit) but I’m so glad to be on the edges. I like living here in the world of personal development, spirituality, alternative medicine, energy healing, quantum physics and all of it.
Even when I don’t agree with it all, I love it and I love being a part of it.
That’s why, when I was totally burnt out, I was reallly frustrated. I would read things on manifestation and the law of attraction and mindset and positive thinking and want to throw something against a wall - it all sounded like bullshit to me, even though I’d experienced it earlier in my life.
When I was burnt out, it was because I was not in my OWN mainstream, not in my OWN center. I was trying too hard to be ‘good enough’ for everyone and everything else that I left myself behind.
When you do that, you’re spending an awful lot of time in your left brain and you’re missing the magic, the energy, the creativeness, and the connectedness that your right brain has to offer. When they’re both working, both the left and right sides of your brain, when they’re connected, when they’re communicating properly - the magic comes back. This is when you can use gratitude journals instead of resentment journals and manifestation alongside your goal setting.
But when that right side is off, when you’re not connected, when you’re tired, and frustrated, and your brain isn’t as healthy as it can be - those practices simply add more frustration. This is why, even though I live a spiritual life, I talk to you mostly about the reality of being IN burnout. I’m not trying to convince you to just shift your mindset, because I understand that some healing needs to happen first. I’m not trying to tell you to manifest your way healthy because I know those neural connections that you need for that to happen are short circuiting. I’m not trying to tell you to watch for signs because you won’t trust them even when they show - and none of it is your fault.
It’s programming, it’s thoughts and beliefs that likely originated with your ancestors and not yourself.
So what do we do when we work together? We use the left brain for all it’s worth - I ask a lot of noticing from you - notice when you say this, notice when you do that… keep track, write me notes (we keep all of our sessions in one google doc that you always have access to so that you can track your own progress, and have the tools you need to stay away from burnout after we’ve completed our time together).
By training your brain to notice things, we are accomplishing a major goal - mindfulness - we are switching your awareness from your usual set of thoughts and beliefs and forcing you to pay attention to something else.
That’s part of why the Resentment journal mini course works so well. By focusing on your resentments and actually taking time to notice them and then using the tools provided to transform that energy, you’ve been taken into a natural state of mindfulness where your brain can start to make new connections.
Another thing you get when we work together is personalized meditations. Always under 10 minutes, you get 3 different meditations over the course of 3 months that I ask you to listen to every day (or as often as possible) these are always customized and never repeated. By choosing words and phrases that are consistent with what you need to feel stronger, we are starting to teach your body that change is happening, that change is coming, that you are shifting, right now. Personalized meditations are an incredibly powerful tool to start healing your brain so that you can get back to yourself again.
The rest of our time is focused on creating clarity on what you really want, unwinding patterns that helped you create a burnout state, creating new patterns that will serve you better, reframing old situations to let go of the attached emotions, teaching you to tune into YOUR body and learn to read it’s signals so that you can regain trust in yourself again.
This process is so fun for me to participate in and watch and I’m always so proud of the work that you do - and what’s most fun is this: the healing starts and then the magic re-enters. You’re able to manifest again, you feel gratitude head to toe, you let go of old resentments and create space for noticing joy, your boundaries get better so your relationships improve. Synchronicities start happening, opportunities that didn’t exist before show up like magic - it’s a pure JOY for me to watch this unfold.
I’m finishing a few clients this month and really looking foward to sending them off into their own magic and creating space for the next perfect clients to come my way. I have space for 3 new clients in August, will one of them be you?
If you suspect that it might, book a call and let’s figure it out together, just head to bit.ly/callcait. I’m really looking forward to your call <3
In today’s episode, we’re talking to Whitney Goodman, a licensed marriage and family therapist and owner of The Collaborative Counselling Center in Miami, FL. She provides counseling to individuals and couples who want better relationships and to heal from the hurt in their past.
During our conversation, she shares her own burnout story, that happened really early on in her life and career and how she felt like a failure being a mental health professional herself. After being told “you’re too young to be burnt out”, she decided to leave her job and go out on her own, quickly realizing that burnout was happening because of the structural inequities at her job and the lack of support in her own life and not because she chose the wrong profession.
We also talk about toxic positivity and why you need to avoid it (despite what social media is telling you), people pleasing and the good, the bad and the ugly of boundaries!
I truly enjoyed speaking with Whitney and this episode is chock full of so much goodness, that I’m curious: What is one thing that you KNOW you need to start implementing in your life?
Both Whitney and I would love to know, so please share and tag us on social media so we can support and cheer for you!
Connect with Cait
Website: www.caitdonovan.com/
Instagram: www.instagram.com/friedtheburnoutpodcast/
Pre-Order My Book: https://bit.ly/bouncebackorder/
Connect with Whitney
Website: https://www.thecollaborativecounselingcenter.com/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sitwithwhit/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/CollaborativeCounselingMiami/
Courses: https://sitwithwhit.mykajabi.com/store/
Xo
Cait
P.S. Do something to care for yourself this week and book a FREE call with me! Initial calls last 35 minutes and are a great way to kickstart your burnout recovery. Book your call at caitdonovan.as.me/free/
In this week’s episode of FRIED: The Burnout Podcast, you’re getting a #straightfromcait episode about my favorite emotion and my favorite topic. I often say that things are my favorite topic because there are so many things I love to talk about (I was BORN to podcast, even if it didn’t exist yet back then ;)). But this one really takes the cake.
Because I said it’s my favorite emotion, you might think I’m talking Gratitude, or JOY, Happiness, or Humorous. I love all of those too, but there’s one that I ReALLY love and I love it for it’s transformative properties. I love it because no one else talks about it. I love it because working with it is SO SO SO Powerful.
So, what’s my favorite emotion?
Resentment!
Some of you may have guessed that because I do have a course that helps you transform Resentment - it’s called The Resentment Journal mini course and for just $27 bucks, you can save yourself years of wasted energy and become an boundary building master.
You'll find the shownotes for this episode at:
https://www.friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/post/sfc-resentment
In today’s episode of Fried, we’re talking to Dr. Kara Pepper, practicing primary care Internist in Atlanta, GA, and a life coach for physicians struggling with burnout, transition, imposter syndrome and perfectionism. A recovering perfectionist herself, she coaches doctors through their own burnout and transition and helps them to love the life they worked so hard to create. She is a wife, mom, yogi and westie lover.
She shares her story of how she went from being a Professional ballet dancer in her teens to becoming a leading physician. She opens up about how she used workaholism to mute her feelings since childhood and although she’d built a great looking life on paper, underneath it all she was miserable and barely holding it together. After her in-laws’ deaths, she crashed and burned out, couldn't keep the pieces of her life together and while she fantasized about running away and leaving it all behind, she finally took a sabbatical that would allow her to rebuild a life that was meaningful, sustainable, and connected.
We talk a lot about making changes in areas that you can actually control,separating the external and internal causes of burnout and focusing on what you actually can change first, gaining energy from that and then moving on to the rest. This talk is so damn important right now as we continue to move through COVID and physician and nurse and hospital worker burnout is going through the roof!
Share this one with all of your medicine based friends, they need to know that they are not alone! We've got their backs and that there is help out there!
Connect with Dr. Kara Pepper
Website: https://www.KaraPepperMD.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/karapeppermd
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kara-pepper-2555b42/
Connect with Cait Donovan
Website: https://www.caitdonovan.com/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/friedtheburnoutpodcast/
Resentment Journal for $27 only: https://www.caitdonovan.com/resentment-journal
Do something to care for yourself this week and book a FREE call with me! Initial calls last 35 minutes and are a great way to kickstart your burnout recovery. Book your call at caitdonovan.as.me/free.
In this week's #straightfromcait, I'm reading to you from my book, The Bouncebackability Factor. I think this passage is important for today because it is all about sitting in the muck when we feel like shit, not spiritually bypassing our problems, and not finding silver linings before it's too soon.
Right now, amidst coronavirus and the very necessary renewed talks on racism, the energy is heavy - and before we try to shake it off, we need to allow it time to process. The passage that I read from the book this week should help you understand why.
If you're stock full of resentments and you're stuck in them, I have a new tool for you! It's The Resentment Journal Mini-Course and it's a $27, 17-page fill in able pdf workbook for your emotional transformation pleasure.
It even got me an article in Forbes recently, so you know it's good stuff ;)
You can grab your copy of the Resentment Journal here:
https://www.caitdonovan.com/resentment-journal
And, if you know you need more support than that, you can always book a free consult to find out how I can help :)
https://www.caitdonovan.as.me/free
My ears are ready for your story <3
Episode Description S02E11
In this episode we’re talking to Deepshikha Sairam, a Business Mentor and Lead Generation Expert for female entrepreneurs who want to grow and scale a profitable online business with high quality consistent leads and recurring revenue, organically.
In this episode Deepshikha shares her story of leaving the corporate world to start her own business, leveraging her skills and talents to build a winning company, which was earning six figures by its second year and how she kept it all going and growing with two young children. In fact, this feat so intrigued the award-winning show, Marie TV, that they had to run a feature on Deepshikha! She also reveals how she was burning herself out to keep all the plates spinning, working continuously and ended up in the ER more than once!
She talks about spirituality in business, how she incorporated rest in her work for even greater profits and why she values self care for herself and her clients.
In addition to offering one-on-one consulting and online group programs, Deepshikha has also guest lectured at Elephant Journal Academy teaching Instagram Marketing. She has been featured in Tiny Buddha and Elephant Journal. She lives in New Jersey with her husband and two boys.
You can Connect with Deepshikha below
https://socialiquegroupe.lpages.co/consistent-organic-leads/
https://www.instagram.com/deepshikhasairam/
https://www.facebook.com/socialique/
XOXO
C
P.S. Remember Nadovim? The supplement specifically designed for burnt-out brains? If you’re foggy-headed and feel like your memory just isn’t the same, you should get 20% off your first 30-day supply at www.nadovim.com by entering the coupon code BURNOUT.
P.P.S. Do something to care for yourself this week and book a FREE call with me! Initial calls last 35 minutes and are a great way to kickstart your burnout recovery. Book your call at caitdonovan.as.me/free.
You asked: What is my burnout trying to tell me? And I answered in this week's #straightfromcait episode!
Within this episode you'll hear my real feelings about 'everything happens for a reason' and you'll hear all 7 reasons you burn out that made it into The Bouncebackability Factor, the book I wrote for you due out late this summer/early fall!
Values exercise mentioned in this episode you can grab here:
https://caitdonovan.com/freebie-values
When you're ready to take a giant leap toward ending your burnout cycle, you can book your free consult here:
bit.ly/callcait
Talk soon!
XOXO
C
In this week’s episode we are speaking to Kelsey J Patel, one of Hollywood’s leading wellness and reiki experts. She is not only a sought after spiritual empowerment coach, yoga teacher, reiki healer and meditation teacher, but also a multi-faceted entrepreneur and inspirational speaker.
Having worked for a senator on Capitol Hill and in the communications department at a Fortune 500 company, she sought validation and fulfillment through work, believing she was chasing success but all she got was crippling back pain and debilitating anxiety. So, after taking a leap of faith to move to LA, she started experimenting with healing modalities after hitting the "Why not?!" stage.
That radical shift started her journey of exploring movement and energy practices that have now taken her to dizzying heights and she believes in paying it forward by sharing them, as a teacher and author, with as many people as possible!
She is the author of the newly published Burning Bright: Rituals, Reiki, and Self-Care to Heal Burnout, Anxiety, and Stress available wherever books are sold.
In this episode we discuss her journey to and through burnout, the small but significant changes that have helped her and her clients ditch the fatigue and overwhelm and her definition of Radical Shifts and why they are essential to breaking from the Burnout Hamster Wheel.
You can Connect with Kelsey below
https://www.instagram.com/kelseyjpatel/
https://www.facebook.com/kelseyjpatel/
XOXO
C
P.S. Remember Nadovim? The supplement specifically designed for burnt-out brains? If you’re foggy-headed and feel like your memory just isn’t the same, you should get 20% off your first 30-day supply at www.nadovim.com by entering the coupon code BURNOUT.
P.P.S. Do something to care for yourself this week and book a FREE call with me! Initial calls last 35 minutes and are a great way to kickstart your burnout recovery. Book your call at caitdonovan.as.me/free.
So, here’s the Q: I’m burnt out and overwhelmed, how do I start to heal?
This is a massively important question and I’ll tell you what I realized recently on some free consults - most of the time, there is a physical component of your burnout that needs to be dealt with BEFORE you head into the inner boundaries, mindset, proper energy spending, and unraveling trauma (and and and).
This means that just last week, I shifted my offer to allow people the chance to use basic Chinese medical techniques and nutrition on themselves to create more physical health before we dive into our ‘coaching’ work.
One of the biggest issues I see in the burnout world, and honestly the coaching world at large, is that we have ignored the physical body. Now, don’t go mental on me, I know that your mental and emotional state has an effect on the physical body AND at the same time, I know that if your body is spending 40 out of 100 units of your daily energy on brain fog because you’re not drinking enough water, I’d rather have you up your h2o intake for 3-4 weeks and allow that to clear. This means that when we start coaching, you have as much energy as possible available to actually do this work.
Download the e-book: caitdonovan.com/freebie
Book a call: caitdonovan.as.me/free
In this week’s episode we are speaking to Dr. Valerie Rein, a highly sought after speaker and trainer who has helped thousands of women. She discovered Patriarchy Stress Disorder (PSD) and created the only science-backed system for helping women achieve their ultimate success, happiness, and fulfillment by healing the generational trauma of patriarchal oppression. She holds an EdM in Psychological Counseling from Columbia University and a PhD in Psychology from the Institute of Transpersonal Psychology. Her bestselling book, “Patriarchy Stress Disorder: The Invisible Inner Barrier to Women’s Happiness and Fulfillment” and her cutting-edge programs have helped thousands of women shift from surviving to thriving and master the game of "How good can it get?"
Join us as we talk about the ways in which PSD showed up in her life, the lessons she’s learnt from doing this work, how PSD and burnout are interconnected and how we can start to turn this around, one woman at a time, starting with ourselves.
LINKS:
Instagram: www.instagram.com/drvalerierein/
www.drvalerie.com/book-resources/ for Dr. Valerie’s Book Resources
XOXO
C
P.S. Remember Nadovim? The supplement specifically designed for burnt-out brains? If you’re foggy-headed and feel like your memory just isn’t the same, you should get 20% off your first 30-day supply at www.nadovim.com by entering the coupon code BURNOUT.
P.P.S. Do something to care for yourself this week and book a FREE call with me! Initial calls last 35 minutes and are a great way to kickstart your burnout recovery. Book your call at caitdonovan.as.me/free.
Hey Fried Friends, thanks to your help on voting on this month’s #straightfromcait episodes. You told me that by far you want to know about how to actually build boundaries. You’ve probably read some ideas online and been told that you can be assertive without feeling guilty and all that, but it’s not working for you and you’re wondering how the heck you can build boundaries that anyone will actually pay attention to… well, we’re going to chat about that today!
I want you to keep in mind during this episode that if you’ve struggled with this for a long time, it might be the right moment to ask for some help - you can hop on a call with me by going to bit.ly/callcait
So let’s get into it.
Boundaries are one of the most important pieces of healing from burnout - BUT - they’re not the boundaries that you’re thinking about.
When you hear boundaries? What pops into your mind? Are you thinking about how to say no to someone? That’s assertiveness training. Are you creating language around when you’ll respond to emails, for instance - thanks for writing, I respond to emails mon-fri within 48 hours. That’s expectation management. Both of them set some sort of boundaries, but they are boundaries that live outside of you and the boundaries that count most when it comes to preventing and recovering from burnout? They are your inner boundaries.
The ones that you are mad at people for crossing but no one knows (except you!) that they exist. They are the unspoken agreements that you think you have with the world but the world has other ideas.
BIO: Denise Duffield-Thomas is the money mindset mentor for the new wave of online female entrepreneurs. Her best-selling books “Lucky Bitch” and “Get Rich, Lucky Bitch” give a fresh and funny road-map to create an outrageously successful life and business.
Denise helps women release their fear of money, set premium prices for their services, and take back control over their finances. She is an award-winning speaker, author, and entrepreneur who helps women transform their Economy-Class money mindset into a First-Class life. Find her at www.LuckyBitch.com
I have been excited to share this interview with you because it is SO IMPORTANT and Denise is such a superstar and amazing person to talk to. For me, her book, Chillpreneur is the “avoid burnout bible” and there are just so many takeaways that I wanted to discuss with her.
In this episode, you’ll hear Denise and I chat about why she was ashamed to admit that she was burnt out and how she found herself being less than compassionate when her husband’s ticket to the burnout train came in.
Denise reminds us during this episode that making time for fun and pleasure is part of being a successful entrepreneur and right now, she’s finding fun and pleasure in learning the ukelele, and her new pup (go to her IG immediately for pictures… SOOOOOO CUTE).
We also found time to talk about what it means to walk away from something that you’ve put a lot of energy, money, and resources into and why it’s okay (or even necessary) to quit sometimes.
LINKS:
www.luckybitch.com
www.instagram.com/denisedt
Chillpreneur
Soulpreneur talk that Cait mentioned
XOXO
C
P.S. Remember Nadovim? The supplement specifically designed for burnt-out brains? If you’re foggy-headed and feel like your memory just isn’t the same, you should get 20% off your first 30-day supply at www.nadovim.com by entering the coupon code BURNOUT.
P.P.S. Do something to care for yourself this week and book a FREE call with me! Initial calls last 35 minutes and are a great way to kickstart your burnout recovery. Book your call at caitdonovan.as.me/free.
Dr. Caitlin Gordon owns Amaluna Wellness, a holistic health clinic based in Boulder, Colorado, where she sees patients for acupuncture and functional medicine in-office and via telemedicine. Caitlin's personal history of repeated burnout led her to specialize in treating emotional health imbalances, with an emphasis on the mind-body connection. She uses a unique blend of mindfulness techniques, transformational coaching, and neuroscience to help patients create the conditions in which they can heal.
Caitlin burned out after years of living with unacknowledged childhood trauma, a sense of self-worth that was tied to her productivity and external success, a nervous system wired for stress, and a tendency to over-commit and avoid her own emotions. After putting in more and more effort to fix the problem, she finally extricated herself from the cycle by taking time to unwind, asking for support, and developing a new relationship to her own body. I think you’ll appreciate her frankness and honesty in this wide-ranging conversation.
This month’s FRIED guests have brought us back to the topic of gratitude so many times, and it came up again in this week’s episode with Caitlin. In my practice, I see a lot of people who experience shame and guilt when practicing gratitude isn’t easy or transformative. This is important: If a past gratitude practice hasn’t worked for you or has left you feeling guilty, it’s likely you’ve experienced trauma that needs to be unwound, or that your burnt-out brain just isn’t capable of processing gratitude in its current state. And that is not your fault. Burnout changes the brain in a way that makes it impossible to fully experience gratitude.
Say it louder for the people in the back! When you’re burnt out or have unresolved trauma, you CANNOT process your gratitude, and that is NOT your fault. It just means it’s time to call for reinforcement. Reaching out to someone else for help is one of the very best things you can do to get yourself on the road to healing.
Learn more about Caitlin Gordon:
Her website: https://amalunawellness.com/
Her Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/acu.caite/
Mentioned in this episode:
The Eisenhower Matrix (by President Eisenhower): https://www.eisenhower.me/eisenhower-matrix/
My Yoga Nidra meditation: [link]
Until the end of April, I’m offering my 8-week online course Master Your Own Energy at a $300 discount! Find your energy leaks and get your energy back starting right here: https://bit.ly/MYECOVID
Carve out the time and space to make yourself feel safe this week. And wash your hands, wash your hands, wash your hands.
XOXO
Cait
P.S. Don’t forget that you can get a little extra support for your burnt-out brain with one of my favorite supplements, Nadovim. Get 20% off your first 30-day supply at www.nadovim.com by entering the coupon code BURNOUT.
P.P.S. Do something to care for yourself this week and book a FREE call with me! Initial calls last 35 minutes and are a great way to kickstart your burnout recovery. Book your call at caitdonovan.as.me/free.
Shamis Pitts, owner of Pitts Leadership Consulting LLC, is on a mission to help people connect to their greatness, strengthen the employee–employer social contract, and support a thriving and engaged workforce. She provides leadership coaching, training, and development and is particularly committed to mentoring young black women professionals. This year, Shamis launched her “Let’s Live in the AND” campaign to create conversations around leadership and wellbeing.
Shamis’s story will ring true to overachievers everywhere. She started working 12-hour days as an undergrad; as a young professional in the startup world, she sometimes worked 100-hour weeks, powered by the mantra “Impact at scale.” The burnout alarms kept going off, but Shamis kept hitting snooze: A stroke. Tuberculosis. Weight loss. Localized alopecia. Paralysis. She kept over-extending and over-giving, and she had no idea how to ask for support.
After struggling with workaholism and her various health issues, Shamis took a hard look at the toll her lifestyle was taking on her physical and mental wellness. And after many years, she finally rounded a corner. In my practice, I meet so many women like Shamis—women who are driven to achieve, to push themselves beyond their own limits, to hit snooze and tune out the alarms and sink further and further into illness and unhappiness. If you are one of those women (or one of those men!), Shamis is a testament to the fact that you CAN turn things around.
At the end of this episode, Shamis and I urge you to ask yourself this question: What are you doing on a regular basis to ensure you’re being kind to yourself? If it’s hard to answer, it’s time for you to step back, come up with an answer, and then put it into practice. It takes some of us years (if not decades) of stops and starts, doctor’s visits, frightening diagnoses, compromised relationships, lost connections, and other alarm bells before we make a change. No more hitting snooze. If you’re not being kind to yourself, it’s time to wake up.
Learn more about Shamis:
Her website: http://pittsleadership.com/
Her Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/shamfucius/
Her 2020 “Let’s Live in the AND” campaign: http://shamis2020.com/
Here’s a good way to be kind to yourself this week: book a FREE call with me! Initial calls last 35 minutes and are a great way to kickstart your burnout recovery. Book your call at caitdonovan.as.me/free.
Be well this week—in every sense of the word. And don’t forget to wash your hands. ;-)
XOXO
Cait
P.S. I highly recommend Nadovim, a supplement that's great for burnt-out brains. If you need some extra support, get 20% off your first 30-day supply at www.nadovim.com by entering the coupon code BURNOUT.
Jenni Lewis-Ford is a brand and communications strategist, diversity and inclusion advocate, author, podcaster, and wearer of many hats. She’s held senior level positions at major financial institutions and has collaborated with brands like Pfizer, Nikon, and Panasonic. She’s also the founder of Chix Talk Radio, former host of the award-winning 2chix1mic podcast, and a frequent TV correspondent and panelist sharing her thoughts on pop culture, politics, and how to drive cultural change through inclusion, belonging, and gratitude.
“Before I started my gratitude mission, I was killing myself—quite literally,” Jenni recalls. “I was negative, I was full of self-judgment, I was ambitious but never happy.” After becoming pregnant with her first child, Jenni realized something needed to change. That’s when she found a life coach, who introduced her to the art of gratitude. “I say gratitude really helped me understand that I was not grateful for me,” Jenni told me in our interview. “And there’s only one me. I gotta love me.”
Caspar is the co-founder of Innovative Medicine. Caspar burnt out in his 20s, but the experience forced him to search for his authentic self—and he says he had to practice everything he preached at work to reset and bounce back.
More about Caspar: casparszulc.com
Free 35-minute calls with Cait: caitdonovan.as.me/free
For 20% of Nadovim, visit nadovim.com and enter the code BURNOUT.
I've been told in the past week that I'm: overreacting, posting anxious posts, a sea of calm - all from different people. But, I, like the rest of you am a very average human who just found out that life is on lockdown. I have flip-flopped between emotions and spent many anxious days before I found some calm in the new current reality.
After an IG live where I read to you from my new book: The Bouncebackability Factor to share an exercise that I thought might be helpful right now, a bunch of you reached out asking me to put it in a format that would be easily accessible all the time, so, I recorded it for you :)
Campaign donations to get The Bouncebackability Factor published are being accepted and if you found this episode helpful, please consider supporting the campaign. You can find it here:
http://www.ifundwomen.com/projects/bouncebackability-factor
We're in this together. There's no correct timeline. You're allowed to process in the way that feels best and safest to YOU. This episode will help you when you know it's time to let go but you aren't sure how. I call it 'Sitting in the Muck' and it's a life skill everyone should have - and now, you do.
XOXO
C
In this special #straightfromcait mini-episode of FRIED, I, your host, take you through the most common burnout symptoms and tell you exactly what they sound and look like in YOUR life.
Burnout Researcher (and my personal hero) Christina Maslach, PhD, tells us that the criteria for recognizing burnout are:
1. physical and emotional exhaustion
2. cynicism and detachment
3. not feeling accomplished or impactful
But what does that LOOK and FEEL like? It's right here in these 15 minutes.
See you on the other side!
Almost forgot! If you'd like to book a free coffee/tea/adaptogen chat with me - you can do that here: https://www.caitdonovan.as.me/free
In this mini-episode, a listener asked me to talk about Chinese Medicine and Burnout, which I LOVED, so I did right away :).
If you've been around for a while, you know that I have a Master's degree in Chinese Medicine - and if you're new - you just found out! :)
Chinese medicine is an umbrella term that includes what is referred to as the 5 pillars. Acupuncture & Massage, Herbology, Nutrition & Lifestyle, Moxibustion, and Qigong.
In different places, you will see these labeled differently. The fact is that Chinese medicine has a varied history within China and it's even messier when it starts moving to the West.
The point I want to make here is that Chinese medicine is more than just acupuncture but in this quick episode, I speak mostly about acupuncture because it's so common.
Acupuncture has the ability to calm our nervous systems, allow our brains to heal, improve gut bacteria and more which leads me to believe it's the best system for beating burnout.
The points I mentioned that improve the stress management function of the brain are LI 4 (more commonly known as the headache point) and ST 36 (more commonly known as the immunity point).
I hope this episode clues you in as to the power of Chinese medicine when you're burnt out.
If you need help finding a practitioner near you, DM me on Instagram!
A special edition of FRIED: The Burnout Podcast brought to you #straightfromcait based on feedback that you provided!
This is the very first thing I need you to know when you're learning about burnout. There are loads of stress management tips out there - but they are useless if you're ALREADY burnt out.
And because I know that you wait until things are bad until you reach out for help, I know that the information that's out there isn't getting you where you need to go.
Here's where you start - by differentiating burnout prevention from burnout recovery and understanding that burnout isn't just a MINDSET issue. It's a physiological set of changes in your body, gut, and brain that need to be addressed!
There are no shortcuts in Burnout Recovery - and the journey starts here.
LISTEN.
LEAVE A REVIEW.
SHARE WITH A FRIEND WHO COULD USE SOME BURNOUT HEALING.
#endburnoutculture
<3
XOXO
C
Continue the conversation over on IG!
www.instagram.com/friedtheburnoutpodcast
When I first started the podcast, I had no idea where it would go, but I am so glad it lead me here, to Cara Carin Cifelli. She hosts her own podcast called: The Love Your Bod Pod (love that name) and has had her ups and downs with eating disorders, burnout out, feeling low self-worth, and more.
Her experiences span from the fashion industry and traveling to NYC and Paris regularly to working at a law firm, and even becoming a restauranteur before she ended up where she is now: an Anti Diet Health Coach who has 2 books, and a ton of passion.
Her story shares a bit about her sisterhood wound and her journey toward allowing herself to stop participating in comparison culture and start trusting women again (and admitting that she wanted those healing relationships).
This episode is a must listen and a great way to round off season 1 of FRIED: The Burnout Podcast. Season 2 will start with a bang April 5th- so listen in now and get ready for the updated version of FRIED :)
SHOW NOTES
Stacie Mitchell and I have a lot in common. We love dogs. We're both coaches. We're both obsessed with personal development. And we're both highly functioning anxious people.
Stacie has made this the cornerstone of her coaching practice and talks us through her journey from burnout, to awareness of anxiety, to the coaching training that turned it all around for her.
She credits great questions, great friends, a willingness to learn, her family and her mini Australian shepherd (who is the CUTEST - seriously, check out Stacie's IG for pics) with getting her to the place she is today.
In this episode, Stacie talks us through a time that she had to back out of a commitment and how she did it - you'll want to listen to that part and I hope it will inspire you to take something off your plate this week!
Show Notes are here
You can find Stacie HERE
ENJOY and then REVIEW!
Your feedback gives me happy tears!
Annie McDonnell stayed in a job that used up all her energy for 18 years and it wasn't until she left that she realized how much energy she was using at the office day by day just to cope with emotional tension. Following a pair of illnesses in her family, she gave herself permission to explore her curiosity and found that by allowing herself to try, she found out how much energy passion and purpose provide.
Now, Annie practices acupuncture in NYC, at her office: Joy Alchemy Acupuncture and her services include Vibrational Facials that combine acupuncture, sound healing, and crystal healing to give you that less wrinkled glow that we all need after dealing with the stress and pollution of the city!
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Hi! It's Cait, host of FRIED. The Burnout Podcast.
(all show notes are at that link ;))
My favorite thing about this podcast is listening to your feedback.
I love hearing,
'I stumbled onto this podcast while looking for something else.. every episode has me nodding like a bobblehead. A must listen'
And
'I was listening to the interview with Donna Steward and SUDDENLY everything made sense ... I cried tears of recognition'
Be sure to add your voice to the mix by leaving a review and joining the conversation on Instagram!
Talk to you soon!
Cait
Have you ever found yourself repeating the same story about why you're stuck, or why you can't move forward? In this week's FRIED - The Burnout Podcast episode, guest Darlene Hawley gives us tips and tricks to take that story and make something useful out of it. She'll guide you through the process that allows you to take ownership of your story and use it as a force of good in your life - whether it's for your brand, or just your own personal wellbeing.
Darlene Hawley is a mother, wife, connector, storyteller and dream builder. She is also a Brand & Business Clarity Coach.
You can find the Show Notes here: www.friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/post/darlene-hawley
You can find Darlene here:
www.darlenehawley.com
AND, you can always continue the conversation on FRIED's Instagram account!
www.instagram.com/friedtheburnoutpodcast
In mid February, I will be starting a crowdfunding campaign to support the editing and self-publication of my first book: The Bouncebackability Factor: Gain Resilience, End Burnout, and Change the World. Keep your eyes peeled on my social media so that you can grab the reward that you want before it runs out!
Until next time!
Cait
LISA'S STORY: In 2005, I found myself as a solo parent with 2 young sons, lined up in a welfare queue and completely shattered because I couldn't understand how life could have gone so wrong. I felt so alone and without guidance that I made a decision that if I was ever going to get my life together, I would become a worthy guide to other women. FIND LISA: http://www.lisafitzpatrick.com.au Cait's Notes: This conversation with Lisa touches deep into the expectations about what it means to be fulfilled as a woman according to society and then later according to our inner worlds. Lisa talks about her book Healing the Heart Of Your Business and her theories on embracing your feminine energy so that you can also embrace the masculine. We talked about the heroine’s journey, the dark night of the soul, and being stuck in gilded cages. She said at one point: Imagine if I had been the woman who stayed [in my privileged comfort], I felt as if I was in the wrong life”. How many people have woken up and said to themselves: Is this my life? How many people have fulfilled their duties only to find themselves wondering if this result is actually what they wanted in the first place? Our discussion also came around to talking about reattaching to our innate wisdom, our inner compasses, and learning to drop the outside guidance to reach inside and find out WHO we are, WHY we are, and WHERE we're going next. And do you know where we're going? To ourselves. To our desires. To our strengths. We're ending the burnout cycle because we're having these conversations and doing this together. Lisa asks, during this episode, that you remember these few things: You are SO loved Your inner compass still works Aging is vitalizing
Rosie Chehade wasn't always a coach. She used to be an uber-successful career woman with 700 people under her and when her health started failing her... she ignored it. Not wanting to admit to burnout, feeling shame around what was happening, she went through over 2 years of feeling like absolute garbage and getting one diagnosis after another before she decided to make a change. It was one conversation with her doctor that allowed her to finally make the decision, as she tells is, to become the CEO of her own life - and we are so glad she did. Rosie is an amazing speaker and so generous with her knowledge, you'll finish this one inspired (and might need to make an appointment with an acupuncturist ;)).
You can find the show notes here: www.friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/post/rosie-chehade
You can find Rosie's website here:https://www.happinesslifestyle.com.au 0">https://www.happinesslifestyle.com.au
And here are links to one of Rosie's blog posts and a post by Kate Northrup that we discuss on the podcast:
https://www.happinesslifestyle.com.au/this-is-my-story-and-why-its-important-to-you/
https://wanderlust.com/journal/egg-wisdom-kate-northrup-do-less-new-book/
Thanks for listening!
<3
Cait
(You can always find me on IG: @cait_donovan and @friedtheburnoutpodcast - I love chatting with you, so let's continue the conversation over there!)
Donna Stewart is a 25 year veteran of healthcare and has burned out at least four times. Having battled back time and again, she now enjoys a peaceful little acupuncture practice in Portland, Oregon.
Donna started as a physical therapist and worked her way through hospitals, outpatient care, home care, acupuncture school, and the loss of faith in acupuncture and along the way, she learned a few things about burnout that she generously shared this week on FRIED!
Show Notes: www.friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/post/donna-stewart
Contact Cait: www.caitdonovan.com/contact
Loved this episode? Be sure to drop a review!
Melissa and I spent a lot of time on this podcast talking about the internal vs. external causes of burnout and how at the end and underneath all of it - your body has to come first because, as Melissa’s aunt told her, ‘You only get one body’. No matter what the corporation says. No matter what your boss says. No matter what your non-profit that you adore says - YOUR BODY COMES FIRST.
So, as 2020 begins, I’m asking you - We’re asking you - to CHOOSE YOURSELF. No matter what your resolutions are, no matter what challenges stand in your way - choose you. Over and over and over again - it’s a sure path to peace and fulfillment.
Show Notes: www.friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/post/melissa-boo/
Instagram (best place to connect): www.instagram.com/friedtheburnoutpodcast
Melissa's website: www.melissaboo.com
It is extremely important to me that people see their doctors before doing burnout coaching with me because sometimes we find something out that’s an easy fix. Maggie was EXHAUSTED and waking up unrested. She went to her doctor and found out she had slight sleep apnea. Now, she sleeps with a CPAP machine and wakes up earlier than ever with energy to spare. I’ve had other clients and patients find out that they had thyroid issues, anemia, low-level chronic infections, and more. I was so glad to hear Maggie talk about this in her episode because it’s so important. No matter how much I love natural health and Chinese medicine, you NEED to know your labs!
Maggie organizes her time; she has space for rest, for time, and for fun - all scheduled in. This is what boundaries mean to her and she explains that she would judge herself for resting before her burnout and really needed to learn that rest was ESSENTIAL and not ‘Lazy’ or ‘Selfish’ because success, to that point, for her had come by ‘pushing through’.
We also talk about feeling stuck in life and how to get out of it.
You know you’re stuck if:
You feel like there is something missing - that’s how you know you need to explore and listen to the whispers
TO trust your whispers
Look at what you desire
Allow yourself the discomfort of saying No
Allow yourself to disappoint people.
Show Notes: www.friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/post/maggie-reyes
Continue the conversation on IG!
When your self worth is tied up in your business, or your job, or your role as a mother - you take EVERYTHING personally. Everything feels to you a reflection of whatever you’re doing right, or whatever you’re doing wrong and no matter what - it’s never good enough. If you have a 'good day' at the office and feel good about yourself, it feels okay. But when you have a bad day and feel like crap - you've woven your value into your performance and the two should remain separate!
"I was so driven with the need to get approval from this, and my self-worth was wrapped up in it so the idea of letting it go, even though it was the exact thing I needed to do, was super hard for me." - Cyrina Talbott
Show Notes: www.friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/post/cyrina-talbott
Follow on IG: www.instagram.com/friedtheburnoutpodcast
Follow Cyrina: www.instagram.com/cyrinatalbott
FIND Cyrina: https://www.cyrinatalbott.com/
Learn about Rapid Transformational Therapy: Rapid Transformational Therapy
Don't forget to leave a review on Itunes! It helps small shows like mine get more ears :)
Thanks for joining me to #endburnoutculture
Kayla Rose Yoder has many titles and accolades galore. The grand sum is that she's a talented coach and energy healer that has walked through her own shadow parts and lived to tell the tale. Kayla burnt out the first time at 15 and started smoking weed shortly thereafter which turned into a many-year battle with addiction. She was primed to be a success with socially responsible progressive parents, a focus on education, involvement in Landmark Forum from the age of 8, and a family of highly successful lawyers and doctors. Her story, instead, took her through addiction, codependency, and surrendering to the guidance of a higher power and reconnecting with her soul to become the person that she is today. Her story is powerful.
Show Notes:
www.friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/post/kayla-rose-yoder
Kayla's website:
www.kaylaroseyoder.com
FRIED on Instagram:
www.instagram.com/friedtheburnoutpodcast
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Leave a review on Itunes!
This conversation might be triggering. Corina didn't hold back and was really open and honest about still being in the thick of the journey through burnout even though she already dropped the overworking piece of her puzzle. Now, she is working to not only clear inner traumas (both her own and generational traumas) but also to create a community of people that support her. The pace of the current world is a piece of the burnout puzzle, which is why this podcast exists. There needs to be a collective movement to shift this tendency on our planet. Culture changes by people. It's time for us to say NO to burnout culture and start building sustainable lives and a sustainable planet. Raised by two deaf parents and immigrating from communist Romania to Canada in the 80’s, Corina has had her share of trauma and shares with us stories of sneaking out of Romania, a return visit a few years later, and now the process of getting information about her and her family from the secret police files that have started to be released. This is an amazing story of survival. Be relentless in your choices when it comes to your closest people - it might just be the thing that heals you.
Nathalie told me that a major catalyst for her was realizing that she wanted a family in the future and she already didn’t have enough energy to make it happen. After getting blood work that said that she was fine, Nathalie found her way toward natural medicine, staring with spirulina and then moving more and more into the world of nutrition, superfoods, and more. Listen to this one all the way through the end - Nathalie has an important message just for you. Show notes: www.friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/post/nathalie-norris/
Aisling Fitzgibbon, Holistic Nutritionist Coach has studied many energetic healing modalities through the years. After being diagnosed with depression and medicated at a young age, Aisling went through a few rounds of burnout before really deciding to heal when she met another holistic nutritionist who taught her to view her body and her energy differently. That, with guidance from her mother about releasing the need for a specific outcome, created a space of trust that allowed Aisling to heal. She now teaches others to do the same through her membership, Energy is Your Currency.
Show Notes: www.friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/post/aisling-fitzgibbon
After a threatened miscarriage, instead of listening to the whispers, Kim Porter doubled down and went for it in her business because of the fear that if she slowed down and let go of what she had built, none of what she had done until that point would have had value. Can’t you just feel that in your gut? The need to stick with a job, a career, a relationship because you’ve invested in it already, because it's part of your identity?
“I was so busy striving for goals I didn't know how to stop. Meditation, setting my intentions, and journaling all helped me get back to my center again.” Kim Porter
This is it. Nathalie Norris, nutritionist and all-around superstar asked Cait if she could reverse interview her for FRIED, and Cait agreed. Here, you get the background story, Cait's burnout story, her methods for keeping it at bay these days and her plans for her business in 2020. If you've been curious about what got Cait where she is, this is the one you've been waiting for.... show notes at: www.friedtheburnoutpodcast.com/post/cait-donovan